


Getting Along with Organization XIII

by SplatteredArtist



Series: Black & White [2]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Field Trip, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Holidays, Sibling Rivalry, Some Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 16:28:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 22,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19834072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SplatteredArtist/pseuds/SplatteredArtist
Summary: Now that Rauxdi moved in a month after the events of Shenanigans with Organization XIII, the fifteen individuals now have their hands full. Time for a year of bombastic adventure with the crew!





	1. New Semester, New You?

"I'm actually surprised that the old geezer is letting me walk around like this. For all I know, he could have tried to take me away in a sack and toss me into the closest river."

"I gotta be honest, thought you were going to kill him while he slept," I remarked as I walked with Rauxdi through an alleyway in Twilight Town.

She shrugged as she sucked on the sea salt ice cream she unwrapped.

"I would have to come up with a better plan than that, I wanna catch him by surprise. But then again," She stopped as she made a motion of crunching something in her hands, "I could just beat his pride into the ground and be satisfied with that."

I just shook my head and snorted, "Enough talk about your revenge for him kicking your butt all those years ago. We gotta get back to the others or they'll all melt."

"Alright, although you didn't have to offer to buy everyone's ice cream. Should have them pay you back in double," Rauxdi glanced over at me as she saw the bag of dripping cold ice cream as I smiled making a dark corridor with my other hand.

"I wanted to do something nice as everyone didn't try to murder me when I was in a sour mood those weeks back when I was being watched during the summer. Plus, I wanna make the last hurrah before the semester starts!" I explained as Rauxdi followed me into the dark corridor.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night if you wanna spend your munny on all those goobers," She said as we exited the other side of the dark corridor into the Grey Area.

* * *

"Hey, they're back!" Demyx cheered as Axel and Roxas raced over to snatch the bag of sea salt ice cream from my hands as they handed them out to the others there.

"You could have said please," I said with a hint of sarcasm as Roxas laughed nervously, "Sorry Audri, we've been dying to eat this with the group like this!"

"Although to be honest, I wouldn't say that is a normal group that would like to hang out," Marluxia said licking his ice cream as Larxene nodded in agreement lounging next to him reading one of her novels.

Marluxia was right. Aside from Rauxdi and I, Demyx, Axel, Roxas, Xigbar, Luxord, Marluxia, and Larxene were all gathered together hanging out for once. No missions, just too much free time to not be invited to this time ice cream party.

Most of these Nobodies are just freeloading on the fact that Xaldin might have banned them from the kitchen for causing shenanigans over the last day or two, and kind of need something to eat. But who's to judge?

Rauxdi finds herself sitting down on the floor as all the couches were taken up by a majority of the Nobodies as I sat over by Xigbar who was eyeing my ice cream in a lecherous way. "So why are we celebrating with ice cream if we're going still going to see you all the time?" Demyx asked out of curiosity as I smiled teasing Xigbar by waving the ice cream in front of his face.

"To be honest, I heard that college takes a lot of skill to get in and be smart. So I figured as a way to celebrate in a way of saying 'Goodbye childhood' and hello to the big times ahead!"

Axel snorted as Roxas nibbled on his ice cream, "Oh please, what big times? What exactly can a human do back on your world? From all those stupid history books you had for school, it sounded like it was boring for thousands of years."

I just shrugged, as I glanced over at Axel, "I don't know, but who says I won't come across something big and awesome in school? What if I wanted to do something to get rich?" I felt my arm jolt for a second, to see Xigbar taking a bit out of the sea salt ice cream looking up at me with a cheeky grin.

"You snooze, you lose girlie," Xigbar says with his mouth half-full with ice cream as I sighed, "Least I won't get brain freeze." He raised an eyebrow before suddenly pulling back and holding his head with both hands.

Demyx and Roxas laughed as Marluxia shook his head, finishing the last bite of his ice cream. "Have you picked out classes yet?" Larxene asked from behind her novel cover as I nodded counting on my fingers, "Sure did! I got an Acting class, some Math classes, a Language class, and a Speech class!"

"Speech class? The hell type of stuff can they teach in a class like that? How to give a boring-ass speech like Xemnas?" Axel groaned as Marluxia shook his head, "If I understood correctly from Audri's papers from the school, it's to help the humans to interact with others around them if they've been outspoken by their peers over the years. It's kind of like a way to make new friends and learning how to speak your mind."

"Oh my god, you're such a nerd Marluxia." Xigbar cackled before Marluxia hit him on the back of the head, "I'm just repeating what the paperwork said."

"If that is the case... Maybe we should make a new identity for Audri. It's the least we can do while we're here right now," Rauxdi said as she crossed her arms behind her head as she lied down to stretch her back.

"Make a new identity?" "Oh you know, just lie about your name, age, where you came from, and make your life sound so fucking awesome," Rauxdi continued to explain as Larxene snickered as she commented, "Like we don't do that already."

I sat there for a moment glancing among everyone as I could see the glimmer of excitement and trouble in their eyes. I sighed and scratched my head, "Where do we start?"

* * *

"First-" Rauxdi slammed her hand on a chalkboard we pulled out of Vexen's labs and propped up on the couch where Larxene was lying down, "We should come up with some personality traits."

The rest of the Nobodies including myself were just sitting on the ground as we looked up at Rauxdi and the gloomy empty chalkboard. "Anything? I mean we can throw shit at the wall and see what she can pull off," Rauxdi mentioned as the rest of us shrugged. Rauxdi shook her head in mild defeat until Demyx waved his arm around frantically.

"Alright Demyx, what do you got for me?" "What if we say **Audri is a macho bear in disguise?** " He shouted with too much enthusiasm as I just looked at him in horror, "Really Demyx?"

"Not exactly a personality trait, more like a... backstory, but we can put that on the board over here," Rauxdi nodded slowly as she scribbled a note on the corner of the chalkboard. Xigbar held up his hand in embarrassment, "What about **Audri got into college with her good looks?** "

She clicked her tongue against her teeth as the Nobody shrugged before writing on the board again, "Let me expand that by saying **Audri is dumb as a rock, and only has good looks.** " "What the hell guys," I groaned as Larxene just pulled another novel from her jacket, "This might take a while and a lot of roasting. You should probably distract yourself."

I just looked at the book before taking it from Larxene's hands, getting up and going to go sit in the corner away from the others.

* * *

Luxord walks into the Grey Area with a grey v-neck, leather pants, and fuzzy slippers. He was holding a pint of Irish coffee about to enjoy the rest of the afternoon but almost jumped back as he noticed a twisted and depressing aura in the room.

"What in the hell," He said as he saw the group of Nobodies arguing over a chalkboard scribbled with different words, and Audri in the corner of the room with her back turned to everyone.

The Gambler took a deep breath before he walked over to the Nobodies first. "What is this all about? What are you all doing," He asked all the Nobodies standing there, except for Larxene who was paying no attention to the group again, turned to look at Luxord with looks of desperation on their faces.

"Wha-" "We need an anonymous opinion! Can you help us decide," Roxas groaned, running up to Luxord grabbing the front of his shirt shaking him lightly. "As the Gambler of Fate, I would love to help, but I need to know who lost the bet," Luxord said beaming in pride as Demyx and Axel glanced back at Rauxdi.

"Well, we're actually trying to come up with a new identity for Audri. She's starting school soon and we wanted to make her look like a badass, but..." Rauxdi started to talk as Xigbar stepped up to Luxord from the side, "These morons are making her look like a tool with all these weird traits they think she needs."

Luxord just looked at everyone there before glancing over at Marluxia who was still facing the chalkboard. "What's your opinion on this entire situation Marly? This is what these muppets have been doing for how long now?" Luxord asked as Marly glanced back at him with bags under his eyes, "We've all been at this for three days. She starts school tomorrow."

"Nope, not doing this. I'm out," Luxord started to turn away as he felt a tug on his legs trying to move. "Please help us! We've all gone mad and tired of arguing!" Rauxdi groaned as she wrapped her arms around his legs. He thought about kicking her off and taking off from these tossers, but he saw Audri in the corner hitting her head against the wall mumbling to herself.

He sighed as he looked at his pint and downed it in one gulp. He turns to face them all annoyed. "Let's see what we got here," He said as he walked past the Nobodies, stepping over Rauxdi and standing next to Marluxia. He skimmed over the choices on the board and couldn't help but laugh.

From the looks of it, everyone tried to create an ideal version of Audri, but based on their own characteristics and personality traits.

_No wonder these tossers were having a hard time, they can't stand to see another one of them running about here!_ Luxord thought to himself as he glanced back at the group, noticing their faces were full of a mix of exhaustion and desperation that he would pick a category of traits already.

He shook his head as he passed the Nobodies and walked over to the corner I was sitting in. "Audri, snap out of it love. You're going to give yourself a fractured skull," Luxord said as he put his hand in front of my bruised forehead, keeping me from hitting the wall anymore.

He stood me up and walked me in front of the chalkboard. He pointed from over my shoulder to the words on the board and spoke, "All of you are idiots. I get that you all fucked up big time, but no need to pressure her into being a better you."

"But we-"

Luxord just glared at the group, making them shut up immediately as he placed his hands on my shoulders looking down at me, "I know you probably dealt with these idiots a lot the past few days, and I know you are tired of being knocked down and being built up again by others. But, what do you want to do for yourself?"

I looked at the chalkboard, with a half glazed look over my eyes from exhaustion. I took a step away from Luxord's grip as I walked towards the board resting on the couch. I ran my fingers over the words on the chalkboard, dusting it slowly before I pushed the chalkboard back.

**_CRASH_ **

I rubbed my eyes with one hand as I heard Rauxdi and Axel starting to panic. I open my eyes again to see the chalkboard had fallen off the backside of the couch and had shattered into hundreds of tiny slivers and pieces.

I glanced at the group and laughed with a glimmer in my eye, "I want to be a blank slate. I want to make mistakes and learn from them. If you don't like it, then fuck off."

The group of exhausted Nobodies looked at me in shock as Larxene got up with her novel and gave me a thumbs up on her way out the door. Luxord smile about to speak up before a shrill scream came from the doorway.

" **M-MY CHALKBOARD! YOU-! YOU IMBECILES! YOU'RE GOING TO ALL PAY FROM YOUR ALLOWANCES!** " Vexen shouted as he summoned his shield, in an absolute state of blind rage as he saw the group caught in an awkward predicament.

"I'm out," Rauxdi grabbed Axel and Roxas by the back of their shirts and yanked them through a dark corridor she made. Xigbar jumped through, following the trio. Marluxia and Demyx dived into their own dark corridors as Luxord held his hand out to me with a cracked smile on his face, "Lead the way?"

I laughed as I grabbed his hand, leaning back into my own dark corridor, "Fine by me."

"WAIT, YOU BASTARDS OWE ME A-" Vexen's voice was cut out once the dark corridor was closed.


	2. Stalking my First Crush

"Okay everyone, time is up for the day! I want all of you to finish Chapters 2 and 3 on Grammar before our next class," The Literature teacher shouted over the crowds of freshman who were packing their bags ready to rush to their next class. I stuffed my books into my bag as I glanced over to see one of my classmates waving goodbye to his friends.

_This is the day! I'm totally asking out my first college crush!_ I thought to myself as I quickly jammed the bag shut and went after him.

As we exited the building with a sea of people, I managed to see the pretty brunette with glasses heading back to the dorms.

"Excuse me, coming through. Trying to make history," I said out loud as I tried to shove my way through the crowd. I finally escaped and glanced around to see the guy I was trying to pursue.

"Hey Shane, wait for-" I started to shout before I got yanked back by my bag. I glanced up to see Saix dressed casually in a thick leather jacket and jeans.

"Where do you think you're going Number 00?" He asked me as I laughed nervously. "I was going to... go ask a classmate to see if he had all the notes from class today?" I smiled with a shrug as he turned me around to face him. Saix sighed as he pulled me to the side of the building and making sure the coast was clear.

"I know you've been trying to follow that poor young fool for the last week. It is a surprise he hasn't changed classes yet," Saix said as he made a dark corridor for home.

"You been wha-" I started to shout as he shrugged, "You had been acting strange at home. Superior sent me to make sure there were no threats you couldn't handle. Apparently, there is."

* * *

I just stomped down the dark corridor with Saix next to me. "You didn't have to interrupt back there, couldn't I try just try to talk to him?" I asked as Saix raised an eyebrow with a tired look on his face.

"If you mean you bombing badly, then yes I do. There's work that should be done before you try to... well, butter up a fellow like him," Saix said with a stern look on his face.

My response? I gave him the middle finger.

"You're one to talk about this type of subject since we've fooled around," I grumbled as he shrugged, "I don't mind if you do try to court imbeciles. Blame Xemnas, not me." I raised an eyebrow as we walked into Xemnas' office through the end of the dark corridor.

"Hey Superior! What's this dumb rule about not letting me intermingle with the locals?" I barked as I stomped towards Xemnas' desk as he glanced up from his paperwork. "Well it depends, why do you need to intermingle with the humans from your world? Can it help us get an upper hand in our own plans? Will we be able to complete Kingdom Hearts?" He asked glaring through me as I adjusted my bag.

"If anything... maybe I can practice how to manipulate others since all humans are the same no matter where they live?" I said trying to sound convincing enough as Xemnas sighed.

"Saix, why is she actually upset?"

"I stopped her from being able to flirt with a college boy in her class."

"What? You can't be wasting your time oogling over boys! You need a real man in your life," Xemnas said slamming his fist on the table as my jaw dropped.

"Are you seriously pulling the dad card on me Xemnas? I'm old enough to make my own decisions!" I shouted as Xemnas leaned back in his chair crossing his arms in disbelief.

"What can I do or say to change your mind so I can practice talking to the locals from my world?" I asked after calming down from my little outburst. Xemnas closed his eyes for a moment before speaking, "If you can talk to this boy and manipulate him to be wrapped around your finger, then you can do whatever pleases you."

I took a deep breath and sighed shaking my head. "Okay, I can do this. I can totally do this!" I said as Xemnas smirked, "If you say so."

* * *

"So why are we camped out in a shrub by the dorm rooms? Are we going to go sneak in and do a panty raid," Xigbar asked as I pulled a pair of binoculars from my bag.

"No you moron, I actually need to find an opening to approach this guy from class," I explained as I handed him a telescope. He just glared at me before using it to glance around the windows.

"Okay, I get why you brought me here to look like a shitty gangster, but why is the werewolf here?" Xigbar asked as he pointed to Saix sitting on the bench next to our hiding spot as I rolled my eyes.

"He's just here to pick a fight with me. I think Xemnas put him up to it," I grumbled as Saix glared a hole through my skull.

"Actually I've been sent by the others as a witness for a number of bets being placed if you succeed or not."

"Say what? What a bunch of assholes!"

Xigbar looked away sheepishly as he spoke up, "Oh yeah, for sure. I wonder who else is betting for you to fuck up..." "I get it, I get it. The entire Organization thinks I'll be a chicken," I grumbled as I suddenly put the binoculars down, "Oh shit that's him! The one in the red flannel."

Xigbar popped his head out of the shrub trying to look for my crush before I pulled him back down. "That's your crush? He looks like a nerd! Are you sure he ain't flaming with that style," He asked glancing at me as I shrugged.

"I dunno but I think he's pretty attractive!" I hissed before I scrambled out of the bush and dusted myself off.

"How do I look, good enough to pass as cute?" I asked in a hasty fashion as Saix and Xigbar just exchanged a look between themselves before giving a thumbs down.

I sighed and turned out as I grumbled, pulling my bag from a dark corridor, "That's fair. Wish me luck!"

* * *

"Hey Shane, wait up!" I called out as I ran towards my classmate who was coming from the student center. He raised a hand at me and smiled a little, "Hey, uh.. You're from my Literature class right?" I nodded and smiled as I walked with him along the grass, "My name's Blanca, I guess you must be a freshman too?"

He nodded and sighed, "To be honest, I really hate this class since Literature isn't my strongest suit."

_Oh thank gods, an opening!_ I thought to myself as I stopped for a second fumbling with my hands, "I see! W-well I used to be decent with those classes, so if you ever need help... I could try to-"

"Heeey Shannne! There you are!" A shrill voice came from behind us as we turned to see a pink-haired girl with ebony skin tackle him for a hug. "Oh, hey Rebecca! I was just on my way to your class, did you get out early?" Shane asked surprised by the girl who was now wrapped around him as she shook her head.

"Our class canceled due to electricity problems, and my phone died so I couldn't get ahold to tell you about moving up our date! Oh, who's this girlie Shane?" The girl named Rebecca asks with a slight hint of embarrassment on her face.

"Oh, right! This is Blanca, she's a classmate in my Literature class. She caught me on my way over and she was going to... Where did you say you were going again?" Shane asked as they both were staring at me.

I felt my stomach cramping up like it was being sucked into a vacuum. I feel like the biggest idiot in the world.

_Holy shit, why didn't I think he wouldn't have a girlfriend?_ I thought to myself as I can feel myself trembling and my face getting really red.

"W-well, you see... I was going to... to-" I stumbled over my words in front of the two people I rather bury to hide this mistake forever.

"There you are Blanca! I've been waiting forever for you!"

I blinked for a moment before turning around to see Xigbar walking over to me with flowers in hand. I just felt my blood go cold as he walked over to me handing me a bouquet of carnations in beautiful pastel colors of white, pink and yellow.

"O-Oh hi Xiggy! I'm sorry, I lost track of time since I s-stumbled across my classmate Shane!" I said, finding the perfect cover since he literally swooped in to save my ass from further embarrassment.

"Nevermind that, I can't believe you forgot that today is our anniversary," Xigbar said with a slight look of disapproval on his face. I can feel myself grinding my teeth as Rebecca gasped, "No way, it's your anniversary? Congrats girl looks like you bagged yourself a pretty cute daddy!"

"Y-yeah, you have no idea how lucky I am!" I laughed bouncing over to Xigbar's side grabbing his hand and snatching the bouquet from him to cover my face.

"Well, we won't hold you up anymore as it seems we kept you late from plans. It was nice meeting you man," My crush said with a smile towards Xigbar's chilly aura as he nodded putting a hand on my shoulder and leading me in the opposite direction.

* * *

"Where did you get the flowers from?" "Snuck them out of an art class that was on lunch break. Hope they didn't need those for their still life project," He commented as I laughed slightly brushing my hand through the flowers.

We stayed quiet for a moment as we walked through the hallways back at the Castle. "Thanks for... swooping in and making me not look like the biggest idiot ever," I said as Xigbar put his hand on my head, "Should have trusted your instinct better."

"I had a crush on him! There were no red flags saying he was taken," I said with a sigh as he shook his head, "Can't help you there. But if it makes you feel better..."

I raised an eyebrow as he coughed slightly, "Xemnas was right. You need a man, not a childish fool like him. If it makes you feel better, I like your new name, Blanca was it? Why the change?"

"To be honest, I will still be Audri to all of you, but if I want to keep a low profile with enemies of the Organization, I'll be going by Blanca outside of the Castle's walls," I explained with a smile finding it's way onto my face.

Xigbar nodded as he whistled, "It suits you. At least you didn't go with an obvious stripper name like Bambi or Ariel." I started to crack up as we ended the Grey Area to see the other Nobodies there.

"Hey everyone! Looks like Audri the homewrecker is back!" Axel shouted with laughter as Xaldin and Luxord snickered as they were enjoying a few drafts of beer.

"I would love to see you all try and pick up a lady then!" I snapped throwing the bouquet at Axel as more Nobodies broke out in laughter at the idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to confess: I accidentally did stalk a guy from my class. Maybe not technically stalk but I would try to follow after him to get the courage to talk to him. But I would be too chicken shit and run away. Being a shy girl sucked.


	3. Nymph vs Nymph

Another boring day at the Castle That Never Was. To be honest, I'm terribly bored and groaning over my current assignment by the acting teacher at university.

He wanted me to learn how to convince people that the emotions you show are genuine enough to fool anybody.

But I didn't know where to start or what emotions to fake others out with.

"What am I supposed to do, this sucks!" I groaned as I threw another crumpled piece of paper onto the floor behind me. I ended up in the Library trying to find books on faking emotion as the Organization was pretty good at it. If they didn't fake emotions, they would be just as fucking dull as a pile of rocks.

"Here's another journal from Vexen trying to create replicas of human bodies in hoping to perfect human hearts. Would this help with your acting thingy?" Rauxdi asked as she slammed a giant book onto the table as I barely peered over the book when sitting down.

"Thanks for helping but I don't think this will. If anything, maybe I should stop trying to use books and go with a different approach," I sighed as I folded my arms over my head. I just groaned for a moment as I heard Rauxdi pull a chair up and kick her feet onto the table.

"Maybe we should do another brainstorming session with some other folks. How about just Luxord this time since he was able to get you to make a decision!" She said with a smirk on her face as I straightened up immediately with a blush crossing my face so fast, "Let's not! He's a busy man, I rather not depend on his or the others for my homework!"

I heard snickering on the other side of the bookcase as Rauxdi and I leaned over to see Marluxia and Larxene trying to contain their laughter from my sudden outburst. "Hey Marly, Larxene. Think you guys can help me with my homework? I have to convince people that I'm a good liar, sort of." I asked the two Nobodies as they got up from their chairs coming to our side of the library.

"We would love to help Audri, but Superior gave us special orders to not help give answers anymore," Marluxia said picking up my papers as Larxene nodded in agreement. I was about to give up but I looked up at them grinning, "But he didn't say you can't be part of my homework."

"Pardon?"

* * *

Rauxdi and Larxene leaned against the table as I paced around the room, flipping through some handwritten notes.

"Are you sure this is what you wanna do?" Marluxia asked as he leaned against the nearby bookcase writing something down in my spiral notebook as I nodded. "Might as well make this into a fun competition while I see who's the better bitch, right?" I said to myself as I looked at the two ladies as they glared me down.

"So what are the rules exactly?" Larxene asked as I gave them each a piece of paper.

"The rules are you both have to try and seduce the other men in the Organization. The idea is to see if either of you is a better actress and trying to get them to sleep with you. Once they say yes and try to get you into their bedrooms, call that a success and bail. The tiebreaker since we are taking Marluxia out of this as a second judge, Vexen is the tiebreaker since I know both of you would try to skip him." I explained as Rauxdi raised an eyebrow at her list of potential 'suitors' as Larxene groaned.

"How will you know that we aren't cheating and saying they did swoon all over us?" Larxene asked stuffing her list into her coat as I smiled, "Marluxia and I will be tagging along. I'll go with you Larxene, and Marluxia will go with Rauxdi. We can observe but we can't convince your target to sleep with you."

"Marlyyyyy," Larxene moaned in frustration as he held up his hands smiling, "If it makes you feel better, we're going to be the worst wingmen ever for the both of you if they tried to approach us. So it's all about your own talents."

Rauxdi glanced over at Larxene and slapped her hand on the shoulder, "Guess we got our work cut out for us. Let's split up and get to fucking over our coworkers."

"Sounds like a plan," The Savage Nymph said with a grin spreading across her face.

* * *

**ROUND ONE**

Marluxia watched from afar as Rauxdi knocks on Lexaeus' door. The door opens to show a half-naked Lexaeus in sweatpants and a towel over his shoulders.

"What do you want? Although I would like to hope you aren't causing trouble," He asked coldly as he leaned down to her level as she laughed nervously.

She slapped her face and prodded his chest with one finger as she pulled a seductive look on her face, "Actually I was going to ask if you needed a sparring partner to get hot and sweaty with."

The Silent Hero just looked down at Rauxdi with surprise as he stood straight back up. "Interesting offer but what do I get out of this?" He asked folding his arms over his chest as Rauxdi tried to get on her tiptoes to grab onto his forearms batting her eyelashes.

"Well maybe we could learn a couple of new moves to wipe the competition and see if you're all talk when it comes to your overbearing size," She started to say as one of her hands tried to snake around to his waistband before he grabbed her wrist.

"I'll pass," he growled, pushing her back as she stumbled back into the hallway trying to gain her balance.

"Wait, hold on-" Rauxdi shouted with desperation before the door slammed in her face

"What a good start," Marluxia said trying to hold back a chuckle as Rauxdi groaned stomping down the corridor, "Zip it Marluxia. I got this."

* * *

I gave Larxene a thumbs up as she groaned going to knock on Axel's door. _This is going to be so painful for me_ , She thought to herself as the door swung open with Axel standing there with a confused look.

"If you're looking for the Flaming Prince of Flowers, you got the wrong room Larxene," Axel said gesturing down the hallway as Larxene pulled a cocky smile onto her lips. "I actually am not looking for Marluxia, I'm here to look for your hot stuff," She said sticking her tongue out making the redhead raised his eyebrows.

"Oh really now? And why is that, you crazy bitch?" Axel said with a grin leaning on the doorframe as Larxene bit her tongue to try and not blow one of her victories because of his petty bullshit.

She started to unzip her cloak slowly, making him turn red immediately as she cooed, "I actually want you to come and take me so fucking hard. I can't stand being away from you anymore."

He just turned around for a second before looking over at Larxene give him a wink. "Uh, yeah. Sure! I mean... Yeah, cool. Whatever Larxene, wanna come by later? I have to... clean some stuff up first if you really wanna-"

"Great, okay! Axel you're the best," She said cheering as she zipped back up her cloak and ran down the hallway towards me as we exchanged high fives. Axel just scratched his head confused on what happened before walking back into his room shutting the door.

* * *

**ROUND TWO**

Xaldin pins Rauxdi to the wall with his lances making her drop the ladle she was licking seductively.

"Now why exactly are you messing with my equipment and getting slobber all over them?" Xaldin growled as he grabbed her chin forcefully.

She pouted and smiled, "So I can show you how good I am at licking massive tools. Maybe I can convince you in getting under the counter kitchen advice from me?"

He just looked me down for a second before smirking, "I guess I can put that mouth to good use if you give your word."

"I can help with making dinner or dessert tonight," Rauxdi purred as he pulled the lances from the wall.

"I look forward to... receiving advice then Rauxdi. I could use a woman's touch in the kitchen unlike the useless moron over there," Xaldin said pointing to Marluxia who was trying to cut the same carrot for ten minutes ever so slowly.

"Don't worry, I'll take him off your hands so you can keep prepping for me," She smiled swiftly grabbing Marluxia by the hood and dragging him out of the kitchen as fast as possible.

"You're totally going to blow him aren't you?" "I mean, of course I will Marly, I want at least something good to come out of all of this. Onto the next person!"

* * *

"So what's the plan?" Larxene whispered as I shrugged, "To be honest, I assume that Zexion is going to be hard. He's a delicate guy who will fuck you over the minute he notices something is off."

She groaned as she entered the Grey Area seeing Zexion practicing spells with his Lexicon.

She tapped him on the shoulder and waved a friendly smile.

Zexion just turned around and glared, "I'm not doing anything for you Larxene. You still owe me munny."

"Now now Zexion, what if I can offer you something more than a pouch of munny?" She said leaning on his shoulder as he moved away quickly, "Not having it."

"What what about-" Larxene got cut off as Zexion backed into a dark corridor giving her the double middle finger as he disappeared.

"So much for a chance. That was just him bailing for sure," I said with a sigh as Larxene ran past me to go find her next target.

* * *

**ROUND THREE**

"Yeah sure thing," Roxas looked over at Rauxdi and Marluxia as he was eating a bowl of cereal in the common room.

"Fuck yea-" Rauxdi got caught up by Marluxia as he cut in, "Are you sure about it? Do you really want this Nobody to take your virginity?"

Roxas just glanced at the two of them before shrugging, "I can rub it into Axel's face that I lost my virginity before him."

"He's a virgin?" Marluxia and Rauxdi said raising their eyebrows as he nodded, "So when do we wanna... do it?"

"I'll just show up in your room naked later. It'll be a surprise," Rauxdi said with a smirk making Roxas blush and go back to stuffing his face with cereal.

"Come on, we gotta go before you both embarrass yourselves," Marluxia grumbled dragging Rauxdi away as she made sexy hand gestures towards Roxas.

* * *

Demyx was just strumming his Sitar out on the ledge of Naught's Approach enjoying the cool breeze.

" **HEY DEMYX I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME** ," Larxene screamed as she slammed a nearby window open scaring the shit out of him.

"W-what? But what did I do?" Demyx asked as he cowered behind his sitar as I peeked out the window.

"You can't just declare that he's going to have sex with you," I whispered as Larxene hissed through her teeth, "But I just want another notch on my sexy bitch belt to beat Rauxdi."

"Larxene..."

"Ugh, fine. Hey Demyx, can we hang out and I can stroke your dick so you don't have to do it tonight?" She groaned looking down at him as he looked up at her with a blank look on his face.

"Ah... Uhm, I guess you can if you really want to." He muttered as a blush came across his face. Larxene looked down at me for a judgemental call. I gave her a thumbs up with a sigh, "Sure let's call that a win."

"Sweet! I love you, water boy!" She cackled before slamming the window shut making him cringe even more.

* * *

**ROUND FOUR:**

Rauxdi glanced around nervously as Marluxia slapped her on the back. "I mean it could be worse. We could be dealing with Vexen and still losing," He said as she bites her lip.

"He's going to be ruthless, but I don't know what would work on him," She said to herself shaking her sweaty hands as Marluxia took a few steps back.

"Well, best of luck!" He bolted around the corridor before Rauxdi opened the door to Saix's room.

"Number VII, c-can I speak with you?" Rauxdi asked softly as she looked around the room trying to find him.

"And what are you looking for exactly Number 00?" Saix snarled, making Rauxdi turn around to see the Nobody looking down at her coldly.

"I'm trying to win a bet and just need you to say yes," Rauxdi said with honesty, fearing that trying to lie her way into a victory would cause more consequences for her.

"A bet over what exactly?" He asked, his voice making a chill run down her spine as she laughed nervously, "W-well Audri is doing homework about putting on masks of emotions convincing, and I... Have to race against Larxene to see who's able to get fucked by the most men in the Organization?"

He just raised an eyebrow at her as she looked away. "Well, with how you're approaching me, I would say that this is not making you the best bitch, but I think I know something that will change my mind."

"You do?"

"Strip down right now Number 00," Saix said with a stern voice as Rauxdi froze up feeling intimidated. "Wha-"

She was caught off as Saix started to unzip her cloak and took it off of her, revealing that she was topless underneath.

"Well, that solves one mystery," Saix said with a smug smirk as Rauxdi sighed, "What else do you want? I really need to wipe that smug look on that blonde bitch's face."

* * *

"You are not serious," Xigbar howled as Larxene stood there with a frustrated look on her face.

She had the lead but now Xigbar was putting her behind since he was toying with her. He knew something was up when Larxene said she'd do any sexual favor for him, and he was not buying it.

Larxene just looked past Xigbar to see me giving her hand signals to 'go for it' but she just groaned as Xigbar snapped her back at attention.

"If you're not going to put money where your mouth is, then I'm going to get going then," He said as he started to walk past her.

"Well what is this then," Larxene shouted as she spun around unzipping her cloak to flash him with her tits. Xigbar dropped his paperwork and grinned as he walked over poking her cheek, "Aww, it looks like someone is looking for attention. Alright, sure let's say I want to have a 'favor' done. You can't complain no matter what it is."

She bit her tongue and nodded as he gave her a smooch on the cheek, "Sounds good, see you later girly!"

Larxene just turned around to glare at me from down the hallway, "Who's left?"

* * *

**ROUND FIVE...?**

Marluxia just waited outside of Xemnas' office as he heard a lot of screaming and clattering around inside. Larxene and I walked over as he waved us over.

"How's that red headed bitch doing," Larxene asked as Marly shrugged.

"She went in there with no clothes on after Saix snatched her clothes. She didn't get a yes from him, so who knows what's going on right now. She might be pulling out all the stops now," He said as I put my ear against the wall.

"I can't tell if those are sex noises or not," I whispered as Larxene went over to the door and opened it slowly to try and get a peek.

The next thing Marluxia and I saw, Larxene was ducking for cover as Rauxdi hit the wall behind us with her weapon summoned. We turned around to see Xemnas' clothes half ripped off as he had an energy blade in his hand.

" **WHAT IS GOING ON AND WHO LET THAT DERANGED WOMAN INTO MY OFFICE?** " Xemnas bellowed as Rauxdi slide down the walls as she went unconscious.

Marluxia and Larxene started babbling nonsense as I tried to sneak away from the situation altogether.

I felt an arm pull me back as I felt Xemnas pull me up to his eye level glaring. "I-if it makes you feel better, I was in the middle of working on homework with Rauxdi and Larxene's help," I said sheepishly as he growled pointing the blade at my neck.

"You are going to be cleaning my room spotless with the other three imbeciles here, if I hear a god damn peep out of anyone, I will end you all myself," He growled as he put me down on my feet and stomped off towards the kitchen.

"Does that mean I won because she's out cold?" Larxene asked as I pulled Marly's coat to cover Rauxdi up as she lied there passed out.

"I... I think so, but we still have to clean up apart of Audri's mess," Marluxia said with a sigh as Larxene cheered for her victory.

"If you all want to go on ahead, I can do this by myself. Besides, I did say that I would learn from mistakes like this," I mumbled as I looked to see Xemnas' office in ruins.

"If you say so! Today was lots of fun helping you Audri," Larxene cackled taking off down the hallway as she soaked in her victory.

Marluxia picked up Rauxdi to take her to the infirmary for Vexen to patch up through a dark corridor.

I sighed pulling a broom from my own dark corridor to start cleaning the Superior's office, "The shit I do for my education."


	4. How We Made it into Organization XIII

"What type of idiot catches a cold from underwater?" Axel asked raising his eyebrow as Demyx was blowing his nose like a kazoo in bed.

"Well if someone didn't steal all my clothes, maybe I would have... would have.." Demyx stopped as he let out a massive sneeze as I ran Demyx's temperature.

"Well, he didn't finish his mission so you're going have to cover for his Axel, Superior's orders and all," I said glancing back at him as he groaned.

"Can I even use my weapons underwater? I'm the god damn Flurry of Dancing Flames, not the bubble man!" Axel barked at me as I just looked at him with a glazed look on my face.

"I don't give a shit, the point is that Demyx will die trying to swim around because he's a moron, and you used up all your vacation days," I said pointing the temperate at Axel as he pointed at me, "And what about you? Don't you have something else to be doing today? What about your first mission?"

"It's delayed for the moment since Xemnas knew that Vexen is not going to come up to help him, so he knew that I was getting sick when I first stayed here and should know all the symptoms by now."

I just shrugged before gesturing behind me to Demyx, "Unless you wanna be his nurse, you gotta help him to the bathroom and stuff."

Axel just tried to pick an argument just stopped realizing his defeat. "Fine I'll go, but I'm picking a buddy!" Axel said leaving through a dark corridor as I sighed handing Demyx a tissue box.

Another dark corridor opened up as Rauxdi came through with a tray of food and soups, "Here you do Demyx, hot food from Xaldin!" She places the tray at his bedside as he nodded a thank you in her direction.

"So does that mean I can go Audri?" She asked as I nodded, "Go ahead, thanks for doing that for me. Xaldin won't let me back into the kitchen if I'm even an ounce of the possibility of having sick germs on my person."

Rauxdi shrugs as she smiled giving a quick wave, "Sounds good to me. I'll see myself out."

"W-wait guys! I actually wanted to ask since I was on missions at the time," Demyx said trying to get out of bed before I pulled the covers back over him. "Stay still you idiot. But what did you need?"

"I wanted to ask how our initiation went!" Both me and Rauxdi looked at each other as he continued, "I know everyone else said you told them the story, but everyone kept saying it differently from the other. So what happened exactly?"

Rauxdi and I pointed at ourselves as we spoke, "I won."

"Say what pipsqueak? I totally kicked your ass," Rauxdi sneered as I just glared at her, "Hell no I pummeled you down."

"How about start from the beginning, I can try and listen to the best our my abilit- AHCHOO!" Demyx sneezed all over his hands as he grimaced from the thought of getting sick.

"Well... I got nowhere else to go, I don't mind sticking around," Rauxdi said sitting on the end of the bed as I pulled up a chair. "Alright, so where do we begin..."

* * *

Audri raised an eyebrow as she found herself knocking on Xemnas' door after Saix dropped off a message that he needed to see her. She opens the door to see Xemnas, Vexen, and Rauxdi talking around his desk.

"What's everyone doing in here exactly," She asked walking between Vexen and Rauxdi as Xemnas stood up from his chair.

"We are here gathered today to begin your initiation to have both officially appointed into the Organization. Vexen will be here to study you both to see what happens," Xemnas said as Rauxdi just lowered her gaze, "When what happens?"

Vexen cut in as he crossed his arms and paced around the room. "Because we still haven't found a way to figure out why you exist Rauxdi, we decided to pit both of you against each other and see what happens. Being if you both fight as equals or as a power struggle being shared by the same entity," He explained as Audri sighed, "So I gotta kick her ass."

Rauxdi stomps as she snaps at the girl next to her, "Says you! I'm going to kick your ass so hard my foot will come out the other side!"

"Ladies, please," Vexen said as we just glared at each other. "We had a place ready for you to both fight if you are both prepared," Xemnas said as he summoned a dark corridor. Rauxdi scoffed as she walked through the dark corridor.

Vexen walked through as Audri hesitated to walk through. "What's on your mind?"

"I... still haven't summoned a weapon, I just summon dark corridors for stuff I need at the time," She said looking at the floor as he sighed. "If it makes you feel better, we will stop the fight if it becomes lethal," Xemnas said holding his hand out to her.

Audri shook her head and walked through, rejecting Xemnas' outreached hand.

"My good sir, are you sure Castle Oblivion is the best place to do this?" Vexen asked as Xemnas nodded, "It's contained enough as a research facility. We just got to hope these two don't turn this into a calamity."

"I can't believe you said that Superior," Vexen said nervously as they both watched the two girls standing in the middle of the room.

"Ready to get pounded in the ground?" Rauxdi said as she summoned her giant metal gauntlets as Audri nodded nervously. "You know it!" Audri laughed nervously as Rauxdi smirked.

"Let's go Audri! Who's the stronger firecracker!" Rauxdi shouted as she jumped high up and ready to pound Audri into a pulp. Audri side-swept Rauxdi's fist at the last possible second, grabbing hold of the glove and swinging herself towards the ceiling.

Rauxdi looked up to find Audri had her hands together. As she summoned a dark corridor, she barked, "I'm not going down easily Rauxdi!"

The next thing Rauxdi knew, an avalanche of snow just poured out of the dark corridor, crashing on top of her and filling up the arena.

Audri fell back in the slow, falling on her ass as she sighed seeing Rauxdi wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Gotcha!" Rauxdi jumped out of the snowbank behind Audri, her gauntlets open wide for the grabbing as Audri summoned a dark corridor underneath her to fall through. Rauxdi fell headfirst into the snow as she got up shouting.

"This is bullshit! Don't be a damn coward!" Rauxdi screamed as Audri appeared behind Rauxdi and tackling her into the snow.

"Sir... Does Audri even have a weapon?" Vexen asked raising his eyebrows as Xemnas shook his head, "Not at all. Still can't manage it and only summon dark corridors."

Vexen's jaw just dropped at the realization as he shouted, "She still hasn't summoned a weapon!?"

Audri just kept jumping back from Rauxdi as she kept swinging her fists at her.

"Dammit Audri, will you just stay still!" Rauxdi snarled as she found contact with the wall behind Audri's head.

"No thanks, don't wanna die today Raux," Audri said laughing as she slides through a dark corridor and came up behind her holding her back from swinging another aimless punch.

"I gotta admit Rauxdi, you're kind of pathetic. I can't believe you can't land a hit on me, why can't you after all these years? You used to beat me up all the time," Audri taunted her as Rauxdi growled as she fell back, crushing both of them in the snow pile.

"You're the dipshit that can't summon a weapon, I think you have no reason to talk!"

A dark corridor opened up beneath Rauxdi, immediately dropping her on her face as Audri leaned outside of the dark corridor frowning, "Weapon or not, I'm kicking your as-"

Audri got yanked out of the dark corridor as Rauxdi launched her gauntlet and grabbed a hold of Audri and pulling her back to her.

"Aw, guess I got caught," Audri said sticking her tongue out as Rauxdi growled. "Nice try Audri, you dumb ass," She said clicking her tongue against her mouth as she pulled her free hand back.

"I suppose she didn't have much of a chance beating her. Such a shame," Vexen said before Xemnas smirked.

As Rauxdi started to aim for Audri's stomach, the impact never arrived as Audri held her hands out and caught Rauxdi's fist, struggling to hold her Nobody's strength back. "Fuck off Rauxdi, I'm not giving up that easily!" She snapped as the redhead gritted her teeth trying to push forward.

Audri grunted in frustration as she felt her fingers cracking from the force of Rauxdi's attack, not really breaking but just popping.

She closed her eyes tightly as she felt Rauxdi finally pulled her hand back and tried aiming for her head.

 _I'm not useless! I can fight... I just need a weapon of my own_ , Audri thought to herself as she started to focus on her breathing. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion as Audri felt something humming inside of her chest. She placed her hands over her heart and dug her fingers into her chest for a moment before she felt something _click_ inside of her.

The next thing she knew, everything was back to normal speed and Rauxdi swung her arm at Audri's face. Her eyes opened up in fear before something moved in front of her face taking the impact of the attack.

She heard Rauxdi's voice shouted "The fuck is that?!" as the thing protecting her face exploded into pages. Thousands and thousands of blank pages started to wrap around her like it was a flying formation. As Audri looked around her, she could hear a small _clang._ She looked down and found that a protruding purple and magenta chain was sticking out of her chest by a few inches and floating in front of her like the end was broken.

 _Is... This what I think it is?_ She thought to herself before the pages around her started to form into a ball of darkness at the end of the chain coming out of her chest. As the darkness dissipates, a thick red and magenta spellbook with a goldish orange heart emblem on the cover appeared with the chain attached to the spine covered in an ornate gold design. It just floated in the air as Audri looked at it.

What caught Audri's eye was the emblem the cover as the heart happened to have with a sharp cross at its base.

Rauxdi was standing there a few feet back with her hands lowered as she looked at the surprise unfold before her. "Hey Audri, you better learn how to use that real quick!" She barked, gaining the girl's attention back as she suddenly slapped her hand on the cover of the spellbook, having it quickly open up to a blank page.

"Ready or not!" Audri said with newfound energy in her body as the book hovered by her side as it was flanking her.

* * *

Rauxdi was barely standing there with cuts along her arms while Audri knocked out on the floor. Rauxdi gritted her teeth as she could feel the sharp phantom pain of papercuts all up and down her arm as she glanced over at Xenmas and Vexen on the other side of the room.

"How long did that last for Vexen?" Xemnas asked as Vexen sighed shaking his head, "About 75 minutes. I'm surprised they lasted that long. But Audri does have one interesting talent."

"And that would be?"

"She seems to have a similar ability to Xigbar and Zexion when it comes to space manipulation. But instead of controlling gravity, she has just harnessed the power of using the dark corridors to provide her with resources or elemental distractions to flee a battle. She's no illusionist, but she knows how to taunt someone into her corner," Vexen said taking down mental notes as Xemnas nods.

"The one thing that came out of this is that Audri finally summoned a weapon. Although it is... an interesting choice. I wonder if Zexion can take further interest in testing out of abilities," Vexen explained as he eyed the unconscious form on the floor.

"I think I know what they will become," Xemnas said as he walked over to see Rauxdi and talk to her.

Audri and Rauxdi were summoned to Xemnas' office a week later, standing by the window in Xemnas' office as he looked down on them.

"Audri. Rauxdi. As much as I could give you more X's to put in your name, I won't. But I know you will both name a great Number 00."

Rauxdi and Audri just looked at each other before Rauxdi asked, "Number 00? Isn't that just 0 then?"

"Both of you are one of the same. Where one lacks in strength, the other excels in it with pride. Where one lacks in curiosity, the other excels beyond measure," Xemnas said as Audri just glanced at Rauxdi, "Did he just say...?"

"He did just say that we're either the weak or the dumb one," Rauxdi said with annoyance as Xemnas pinched the bridge of his nose.

"For the meanwhile, you both excel in different areas, but that could change if you both trained in other aspects if you tried. There is no destiny where you can't become perfect images of yourselves," He said glancing at them as they nodded, "Because of your connected ties, you are both know as the Two-Headed Vulture."

"A vulture? That's not exactly cute is it," Audri said as Rauxdi shrugged, "Can we pick another animal?"

"No, I said you get to be the vult-" "How about a shark, or an orca? Those are more deadly!"

"Nah, what about a viper? Since we're more like silver-tongued snake charmers."

"Are we talking about how we both like dic-"

"I don't care what animal you call yourself! But you go by Two-Headed Vulture because you both will be witnesses to the rebirth of the universe! Do I make myself clear?" Xemnas shouted as they both looked at him with glazed over looks on their face, "We'll stick with Two-Headed Viper instead. Do you want my tongue or her fangs?"

"Please leave my office."

* * *

"...And that's how we officially got our title!" I said with a smile as Rauxdi poked me in the arm. We looked over to see Demyx had passed out in bed snug as a bug.

Rauxdi handed me an empty glass grinning, "I might have dumped tons of cough syrup into his drink while you distracted him with the story."

I just shook my head as I put the glass on his nightstand as we left his room.

"I was hoping the story would bore him to death so he'd make us leave faster," I said as Rauxdi choked out a laugh.


	5. Why You Should Never Send Nudes

I glanced around the corridor before I ran into my room, slamming the door behind me.

I locked the door and shut the curtains, diving towards my messy desk with my laptop. I made one final look around before I opened my laptop up logging into Skipper.

I grinned as I saw a blinking notification on my screen as I started to read the message.

_BigJimmy69: Hey girl, glad to see you made it home okay! I wished we lived closed :(_

_MessyBee: Sorry Jimmy, I can't help it when we lived in different places, what can I say?_

_BigJimmy69: *slides on over the country to sit on your couch* Well if it makes you feel better, I would love to take you out on a real date._

I grabbed my chair pillow and squealed into it, shaking with excitement as I put the pillow down to come face to face with Vexen's head out of a dark corridor.

"FUCKING HELL!" I screamed hitting him in the face with a dark corridor as he scoffed, "Why didn't you swing by the lab? I have a new experiment I want you to test."

"Not right now, I'm doing homework with a classmate," I hissed trying to push his head back through as he cursed at me poking his eyes.

The dark corridor quickly closed, leaving me alone with the laptop again. I sighed before writing a message to the guy I was talking to.

_MessyBee: *nuzzles up to you on the couch* How about I fly you over? Maybe I can steal my parent's money or start a funding page to help you meet me! :3_

_BigJimmy69: No worries, I can probably do that. My parents trust me and trust that you'll take good care of me._

_MessyBee: Oh man, that would be amazing! First times, our first kisses... :* I love it!_

I sat there with a big goofy grin on my face before I felt my chair being spun around violently with Xemnas giving me a curious look on my face, "What are you doing and why did you poke Number IV's eyes?" I shifted my gaze to see Vexen standing there rubbing his eyes cursing.

"I... Shit, uh well you see..." I started to say before he slides me overseeing the messages on my screen.

He just glared through me as I laughed nervously, "I can explain!"

* * *

"So... Let me get this straight," Xemnas said rubbing his temples as I stood there looking away.

"You... started playing some internet game from Earth called 'Second Life', started talking to humans through it, and you got in contact with some imbecile."

"That sounds about right," I said with a laugh before feeling Xemnas crossing his arms over his chest annoyed. "Sorry, you can continue Xemnas."

"Right, so you exchanged information with this imbecile, told him you lived on the other side of the country that he resides, and you both started to... flirt?"

I grinned with a blush on my face, "Yes! And he's so cute, I can't wait to keep talking with him."

Xemnas just sighed and hit me on the top of my head with one of my textbooks, "You are the biggest moron here. What do you plan to get from this?"

"Well, here's my plan. What if, in the future, I don't want to work with the Organization anymore? I decided to make an anchor back on Earth, you know... Someone I would know if I do start from scratch," I said with a smile as he just shook his head.

"But you still lied to him," Xemnas said as I bit my lip, "I did but well... I figured maybe he'll understand why I did in the future?"

Xemnas just sighed as he placed a hand near the laptop, "I don't like this... Not one bit, I hope you know this isn't going to go well."

I just gritted my teeth before shouting, "So what? Can't I just make my own decisions about this guy? What if he's the one?!"

"You really have to stop reading Larxene's novels."

Rauxdi showed up from behind Xemnas making him sigh from the annoyance with one more person involved in this conversation.

"As Audri's Nobody, what say you about her wellbeing?" Xemnas asked as Rauxdi sat in front of the computer, scrolling through my archived messages.

"Hey, those are private!" I snapped trying to shove Rauxdi away but she used her foot to hold me away.

"Well, if you want my professional opinion as a third party, I think that he's kind of weird. You guys moved into talking about your personal lives too quickly, even though Audri lied about herself. But even so, you guys talk on a romantic level like way too fast," Rauxdi said as she scrolled back to the recent messages hearing the computer going off like crazy.

Xemnas and I glanced over her shoulder to see messages flowing out like crazy.

_BigJimmy69: So anyways, I wanted to get to see more of you today. If you know what I mean ;)_

"I loathe this human already." "Shut up Xemnas, gimmie a second..." "Wait, Rauxdi! Don't you dare-"

_MessyBee: What do you mean? My conversations got deleted and I can't remember what I sent you before :P_

_BigJimmy69: LMAO! Oh you're so silly, I wanted to see more pictures of your beautiful face and that sexy body of yours! Do you think I can get a picture of your boobs today?_

Xemnas pulled me away as he shook his finger at me, "I don't want to see this imbecile talk to you ever again." "You gotta be kidding me Xemnas, this is for good fun!" I groaned I heard something unzip.

We looked to see Rauxdi shushed us as she started lifting her shirt up, "Can you guys move from the background? I gotta send pictures of my tits to this moron. Pretty sure he's a catfish."

"Don't you dare!" I pulled Rauxdi from the chair starting a fight with her shirt still raised up. She kicked me in the head as I tried to hold her down.

"Dammit, Number 00 and 00! Pull yourselves together! This is the stupidest thing you have ever fought over!" Xemnas shouted as he pried us off of each other.

* * *

After Xemnas gave us a lecture, he sent me off to do Vexen's experiment that I was assigned to.

I found myself grumbling to myself after hours of experiments, seeing I was exhausted by the time I got back to my room. I saw that the laptop battery had drained and was completely dead from being left over.

"Those idiots really don't know how electronics work," I growled under my breath as I plugged it back into the wall.

"That should do it," I said with a sigh before flopping down on my bed. If anything, I can take a quick name and talk to him in a little bit, I thought to myself as I dozed off.

I woke up a little while later, shaking the sleep off as I rolled out of bed.

"Let's see what today brings for me today," I said slapping a grin onto my face before getting up and skipping over to my laptop, ripping it from the wall to pop it open. As I turned it on, I smiled drumming my fingers impatiently.

 _I hope that Xemnas and Rauxdi are wrong, he can't be a bad guy!_ I thought to myself as my computer finished booting up. A minute later, the computer started to make tons of notification noises.

"What the hell is this?" I groaned as I muted the noise, waiting for messages to pop up.

Next thing I knew, a hurricane of messages and images started showing up and make me jump back.

_BigJimmy69: Hey, you still there?_

_BigJimmy69: I know that you're still online, so what's going on? Are you okay?_

_BigJimmy69: Are you mad at me asking about your boobs? I don't have to ask but like... I wanna see you._

_BigJimmy69: I wish you were here._

_BigJimmy69: Why won't you message back. Why won't you talk to me?_

_BigJimmy69: Is it me? Did you find someone else?_

_BigJimmy69: What do you want from me? What is going on?_

_BigJimmy69: Tell me what's going on or I'll do something you regret._

_BigJimmy69: I'll take your photos and send them to the police! Tell them you're sending them to someone underage!_

_BigJimmy69: I'm kidding, I'm not underage... I just want you to talk to me :(_

_BigJimmy69: :'( I'm going to go kill myself, you're so selfish._

_BigJimmy69: Why won't you just love me?_

_BigJimmy69: Love me you stupid bitch!_

_BigJimmy69: I'm sorry :'( I just want you to respond._

_BigJimmy69: Please?_

_BigJimmy69: Well fuck you, stupid bitch. Respond when you read this._

I just stood there horrified as I looked at the messages on my screen. I hate it. I really hate it.

I hate this guy. He's kind of fucked up in the head.

_He's batshit crazy._

_Holy shit._

I closed Skipper down and just deleted the application from my laptop.

"Guess these two were right. Fucking Nobodies always showing me up," I sighed turning the laptop off as I walked out of the room, realizing I had people around the Castle I can talk to without all the nonsense.

At least they seem to have more of common sense than me.


	6. Lost but not Forgotten

"Marluxia, can you help me lift this bag of mulch?" I asked as I wiped my sweaty face with my sleeve. Marluxia glanced over at me from a few rows of crops over and nods. "Give me a second to finish tilling the soil for the new seeds," He said waving over to my as I nodded.

"Take your time, I'll just sit in this hole with nothing else going on," I said as he sighed clapping the dirt off of his gloves. Next thing I knew, I was covered in a mixture of dirt and mulch as Marluxia decided to pour the whole bag on top of where I was working.

"W-wait, Marluxia stop! What the hell," I groaned as he laughed pulling me out of my now-filled dirt hole with his scythe. "Sorry, I was tired of your sarcasm and wanted to get back at you for it," He said with a smirk as I dusted myself off.

"It's fine. With how you acted, it makes it sound like you had bullied younger kids growing up," I said with a scowl as he leaned on his scythe shrugging.

"I sort of did that, then again I had to make sure they knew who's sibling they were messing with," He said gazing off across the rows and rows of crops we were planting. I nodded before I stopped dusting myself off to look up at him.

"Wait what?! you had a sibling? How did I not know about this?" I said surprised as he sighed looking away, "It's not something I talk about. One day, she just disappeared without a trace. I never did find out what happened."

"She? So... you had a sister then," I said sitting on the ground as I started cleaning up the seed packets littered around. He nodded as he kneeled down to help me, "I did. She was kind, funny, and talented. She had a weak body but her heart was always full of pride wanting to help others."

I just looked at Marluxia in awe as I saw a rare glimpse into his past, seeing that he was a person with a full life ahead of himself. _Just like everyone else here at the Organization before things turned to worse, and then..._

"So, do you have any siblings Audri?" He asked, snapping me out of my thoughts as I nodded, "I had two the last I checked before I came here. I have a sister, and another boy who I knew for a long time that he was like the younger brother I didn't want to have. That happens when you're running around in the foster care system"

Marluxia laughed as I put the seed packets into my pants pockets as he helped me carry some tools back to his garden shed. "Were the three of you close then?"

I tapped my finger to my chin as I shook my head, "Not exactly, they were a lot younger than me growing up, so they were practically babied by the adults. I got jealous and always pick fights for attention since I was left on my own with Rauxdi."

"I see," He said as he snapped his fingers, unlocking the shed door as a few Dusks slipped out from the shed, like mice. I sighed as I helped put the tools back in their place, "But it's okay. It's probably for the best that I'm here instead of home, at least they won't have to deal with me making their lives any worse."

We locked the shed behind us as we stood there in silence. "I think that... you're lucky to have siblings. Mostly when you know where they are, and you choose to be here instead of making their lives more troublesome," Marluxia said after a minute as I glared up at him, "That was almost a compliment."

"I'm not finished, I mean like... Because of you being here, you have kind of helped the Organization feel different. Less cold and distant towards each other," Marluxia explained as he swung his scythe over his shoulder, "It's helping some people take responsibility for past mistakes and being able to... make up for them in a way."

I scratched my head as I undid my ponytail, "Kind of like... I'm helping heal people's past sins for whatever they did or didn't do?"

"Not quite, but more like therapeutic," He explained as I let out a whistle, "Thank Hearts, glad you're not putting me on the same level as Jesus or some other gods out there!"

"What's a Jesus?"

"A man that people looked up to on Earth that they think was born and killed to help people be kinder to others."

"That's pretty fucked up Audri."

"Don't blame me, he was already a story out in the open that people believe in," I said knocking a punch into his side as he laughed, "Alright, I'll take your word for it. Shall we go back inside lunch?"

"You can go on ahead, I wanted to fix one last thing before I'm done for today." Marluxia nodded as he waved me goodbye to go take a clean shower in his room.

I looked around the crop field and glanced around finding one seed patch that I planted today with Marluxia. The little sign in the ground said Gladiolus flowers. I smiled as I kneeled in front of the newly planted seeds as I summoned a watering can, sprinkling water on them.

"I don't know who you are, Marluxia's sister, but I want to say thank you. Even though I can tell me misses you, you still have a place in his heart, wherever it may be," I said looking up at the sky with tears running down my face. I rubbed the tears away as I sprinkled them onto the flower bed as I hummed, "You have a nice big brother, he helps take care of some of us and makes sure we have all the fun while we can together. I hope he can find you someday."

I smiled as I put the watering can down and clapped my hands together.

"So wherever you are, please watch over him for the time being!" I shouted before waving and going back inside of the Castle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to all of you hardcore UnionX players!


	7. Breaking through Thick Shells

"Good Morning Lexaeus! How are you?" I chimed in as I saw him walking past me to get to the fridge. He just nodded in acknowledgment as he pulled out some pieces of fruit and then left the kitchen.

I just stood there and sighed, "That's... not a real answer, but I guess you're doing okay."

"You trying to get him to talk to you? You know he doesn't do chitchat," Axel said sitting at the table eating a plate of eggs and burnt bacon.

"Agreed, no one can get him to really talk to us," Roxas said with a sigh eating his lumpy cold cereal.

"Maybe I just haven't hit the right soft spot to get through to him," I said as I walked over to sit at the table pouting.

"If it makes your small heart feel better," Xaldin started to speak as he put a plate of scrambled eggs and fried spam in front of me, "I will rejoice if you get the simple fool to have one simple conversation with anyone. He's always been more willing to speak with Vexen and Zexion than anybody else."

"Hm, were they close when they were somebodies?" I asked as Xaldin snorted going back to cooking more food. "Hardly! I was the closest to work with him. But even back then... He was all work and no play."

"Are we sure he isn't a mute?" Roxas asked raising eyebrows across the table as Rauxdi sighed stealing bacon from Axel's plate, "He isn't for sure. He will only talk if you confront him but he isn't a real people person."

I just raised an eyebrow as I asked, "What were you doing under the counter listening to our conversation?"

Rauxdi and Xaldin just exchanged looks as she laughed nervously, "N-nothing at all!"

"Aw, come on. Not while we're all eating here," Axel groaned Roxas and I laughed.

"I didn't know exhibition was your guys' thing. No wonder we can eat in the kitchen now," I said burying my head into my arms as the realization just hit me.

Before Xaldin or Rauxdi could protest, someone ran into the kitchen shouting.

"No running while the stove's on!" Xaldin shouted as he shot a lance past Demyx's head. He squealed dropping to the floor in terror flat as a shadow heartless.

"What the hell Xaldin," Demyx whined as Rauxdi went over to help him off the ground, "It makes Xaldin nervous. So why are you screaming and running in the first place? We're safe in the castle you know."

Demyx gave her a dirty look before pulling something out of his pockets, "Guys I got us in! I got us tickets to the Olympus Tournament!"

"The what Tournament?" All of us asked as Demyx facepalmed.

"The Olympus Tournament? The one I told you guys where that one strong human Hercules was going to be fighting against a bunch of the Underworld's creatures? The Tournament I've talked about for weeks?" He said waving his arms around as we Roxas whispered at the table, "I thought he lost his mind. I didn't think it was real."

Axel snorted as I got up from my chair snatching the tickets from Demyx's flailing hands, "How did you manage to get tickets?"

"I managed to sneak a few tickets out from some unlucky bastards that got turned into a heartless. So all of us can go see it," Demyx said as we all raised our eyebrows in surprise.

"I... Didn't think you had it in you Demyx, I'm so proud of you," Rauxdi said in a mocking way giving him a side hug as Demyx rolled his eyes, "I'm strong you guys!"

"Wait, this might be a perfect idea. Maybe taking Lexaeus to a massive event like this will make him talk to us," I gasped with my eyes full of determination as Axel shook his head, "I rather him not try to talk to me."

"Well, if this helps with whatever you're talking about, I hope it does help?" Demyx said as I fist-bumped him.

"Let's go tell everyone the news!"

* * *

"Popcorn, get your popcorn here!" A tiny vendor said as he walked around the stands. "I'll take some over here!" Rauxdi shouted to the vendor with a pouch of munny.

The Organization was all spread out through the stands as they wanted to not draw too much attention to themselves. For the time being, we decided to blend in by dressing up like the locals.

Which meant tons and tons of togas.

"This is a little too airy for me," Marluxia groaned as Larxene just tried to contain her laughter. "If it makes you feel you guys better, people got used to this and wore clothing like this for centuries in a small part of the world back home," I said helping Rauxdi hand around the popcorn.

"Wow Audri, I didn't think any of the information from school actually stuck in your brain. How much of a nerd are you really," Axel cackled as I pouted.

"There were only some sections of history that really stuck out because of all the fear struck into our hearts if we failed the classes," I said with a shudder running down my spine. "Besides, if I know which culture this was, then that means..."

Audri was cut off as an announcement was made over the Coliseum.

"Attention all fans! Welcome to the start of our Olympus Tournament! We are all here today to see the mighty Jerk- I mean, Hercules fight against an onslaught of Underworld monsters! I will be your host providing such monsters: The one, the only, and powerful Hades!"

A puff of smoke appeared in the middle of the ring as Hades appeared in his amazing blue glory. The crowds went wild as I grabbed ahold of Rauxdi, "HOLY SHIT HE'S REAL!"

"Of course he's real, real as any other god. Why are you surprised?" Demyx asked as he gave Lexaeus the popcorn as I waved my hands around. I leaned in and whispered to the ground, "You don't understand. Back on Earth, historians have heard that most of the stories about gods from different times were known to be fairy tales and myths. If he's real, then that means maybe people back then were able to travel to other worlds and bring back information!"

"Interesting theory Audri, but why are you excited over Hades? He's kind of a thorn in the Organization's side, not exactly the cooperating type," Vexen sneered eating popcorn from the bag Lexaeus offered him.

"Because he's cool, he's on fire, and he literally controls dead people's souls for a bargain?" I said waving my hands towards the stage where he was still presenting the rules.

The other members just exchanged looks and shrugged. I waddled over between the seats and grabbed Lexaeus by the arm, "Lexaeus! Can we leave for a quick second to go talk to Hades! I want to see if I can get an autograph."

He just looked at me before sighing. "Hold this Vexen, I'll be back," He said as he handed the giant thing of popcorn to the Academic as he helped me down the steps towards the main lobby.

* * *

"Hey folks, you looking for something?" Hades said as we approached him in the lobby. I just pumped my fists up in the air with stars in my eyes as I started to shout, "HADES WHY ARE YOU SO COOL?! IREADSOMUCHABOUTYOUANDITHINKYOUREONEOFTHEMOSTBADASSGODSOUTTHEREASIDEFROMZEUSANDANDAND-"

Hades jumped back for a second as he laughed, "Oh, I see! You're a fan of my work! Well I'm glad you appreciate all that I do. Y'know, making sure the dead stay dead and all." He looked up at Lexaeus behind me as he raised an eyebrow, "I guess you're a friend of hers?"

Lexaeus nodded as I spoke up, "Do you think I could get an autograph Hades?" He smiled as he nodded kneeling down to my level, "Sure thing kiddo, what would you like to say?"

I stopped for a second as I crossed my arms over my chest, "Could it say... To Blanca, your undying fan to the end?" He laughed as he summoned a pen and paper to sign. "Here you go little lady, I hope this makes your day and you both enjoy the tournament. I have to get back before we start the first round," Hades said as he went back towards the main arena.

"He was kind of cool I think," I said summoning a dark corridor to put Hades' autograph away. "He was... scared I think," Lexaeus said as I glanced back at him, "Because of you?"

"Because of you. Probably thought you were going to rip an arm or leg off as a keepsake," The Nobody said with a smirk as I frowned. I was going to shout back but I realized Lexaeus was talking with me!

I took a deep breath and laughed nervously as we walked through a dark corridor back to the others in the stands. "You're probably right, but he can just grow those back right?"

Lexaeus just looked at me baffled before shaking his head following suit.

* * *

Rauxdi sat next to me as she whispered, "Any luck with the big guy talking?" I nodded and glanced over at Lexaeus, "We talked a little bit, but I think he was insulting me."

"Don't we all?" Rauxdi said with a grin as I bonked her on the head, "Not the point. But I think this plan might work."

"And then what?" She hissed as I blinked. "I didn't have a plan afterward, I just wanted to get him to talk for once."

Rauxdi just looked at me and facepalmed. "I can't believe you. You just wanna talk it him, oh my Hearts Audri."

"Says you, why does Xigbar have his hand up your skirt?" I asked pointing to the other side of her with Xigbar casually sliding his hand up the hem of her dress.

Rauxdi whipped her head around and yanked his arm in a pissed manner, "Do you mind Xigbar? Not in public!"

Xigbar smirked as he winked at her, "So then I can back at the castle?" Rauxdi sighed as Hades came back out to speak to the crowd.

"Ladies and Gents! The first round will go to the Rock Titan and Jer- Hercules going head to head!"

"Oh shit, it's starting!" I said jumping up excited before Rauxdi pulled me back down to sit still.

Hercules came out from his barracks, waving to the wild crowd as everyone cheered. He made his way to the center of the ring while Hades summoned a dark corridor for the Rock Titan to come out. As he stomped out, everyone gasped in the crowd at how massive he was.

"Let the games begin!" Hades shouted as the crowd went wild.


	8. Clubs and Lances

"Thanks for being pretty cool as I ask a bunch of questions about Anime Club," I said with a smile as a girl laughed.

"No worries at all, it's nice to have another girl to talk to about all the new anime shows coming out," She said with a smile as a boy came over and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"It'd be nice if we can see you outside of the Club and hang out sometime. Least for dinner or movies?" He said as I shrugged, "I would love to hang out more but I have work after classes. So it's been hard to hang out with people."

"Well, no worries about that. As long as we get to talk and have fun, it's no biggie!" The girl said as she grabbed her bag and holding the boy's hand. "We should all probably head out, I think Anime Club is closing up for the night," He said as I nodded stuffing my books into my bag.

"I'll try to come to the next meeting if I'm not busy, but I hope we can still chat sometimes?" I asked as they nodded. "Goodnight Blanca, get home safe!" They said as they walked away back to their dorms.

* * *

_How cool would it be if I can make a club? It's a lot of responsibility to make sure everything goes smoothly and that everyone is happy,_ I thought to myself as I placed my backpack onto my desk. I looked up at the heart-shaped moon in the sky before clapping my hands together, "Maybe I can bring this up at the next meeting. I wonder when it'll start-"

I felt my weight drop through a dark corridor underneath me as I landed on Marluxia's armrest. "Glad you're here Number 00, now we can begin the meeting," Xemnas said glaring down at me seeing that I was the last one there.

"S-sorry Superior! I just got home from schoo- Wait! Before we start the meeting, can I make a suggestion?" I asked waving my arm as Marluxia grabbed ahold of my shirt so I didn't fall off from moving around so much.

He raised an eyebrow as he nodded, "If you'd like." "Thank you," I said with a smile as I stood up on Marluxia's armrest looking at everyone else resting on their thrones.

"How would everyone feel if we made clubs?" I shouted as everyone just glanced around in surprise by the obscure question.

"What type of clubs were you thinking Audri?" Demyx asked as I waved my arms around, "Well we can decide on those factors afterward, but I wanted to see if we wanted to dive into something where we get to do small activities throughout the week when we have downtime?"

"What brings this up? We don't have time for nonsense since we all have so much work to do," Xaldin asked crossing his arms over his chest as I pointed to him with a grin on my face, "Exactly my point! We are so busy and burnt out that we don't really get to hang around much and spend time doing our own things. Why not mingle with each other once in a while?"

There were some glances around the room as Xemnas sighed, "And what would this entail us to do Number 00? As long as it doesn't require more energy or funds for support, I will allow this little... side project of yours to take place."

I raised my arms in victory as I smiled, "I'm okay with that Superior!"

He nodded as he interlocked his hands together while I started to sit back down. "Now, back to our meeting..."

* * *

"So, what type of club were you thinking of making exactly?" Roxas asked as he kneeled next to me drawing on a piece of paper on the floor. "Well, to be honest... I'm not sure. What do people usually like to do around here?" I said with a hint of defeat in my voice as Axel shrugged, "We don't really relax as we have Xemnas buttfucking us all with missions."

"You're not wrong," Rauxdi said with a sigh as she grabbed the paper I was working on, "What the heck are these?"

"They're dangos! It's the Big Dango Family, I found out about them at the club today since we watched some episodes of an anime. We plan to finish watching it eventually," I said putting Namine's borrowed crayons into a box as everyone just raised an eyebrow at me.

"This is our club recruitment poster when we go ask the other members if they'll join," I explained as Axel just laughed grabbing the poster to look at it. "Maybe we should have a better idea. Have an area where the club members and interested folks can come see what we do," Roxas suggested as I got off the floor smiling, "That sounds like a better plan than going door to door forcing them to join!"

"Wait, forcing them to do what?" Rauxdi said crossing her arms as I cheered, "First let's start with the Struggle Club!"

* * *

"Come on Number V, put your back into it!" Saix snarled from the sidelines as he saw Lexaeus throwing a punch at Xaldin's head. Xaldin dodged his comrade's fist and grabbed it, seizing him over his back as he body-slammed him into the ground.

"Holy shit, is this just sumo wrestling?" Rauxdi asked quietly into my ear as we watched from the arena sidelines. "Well, I thought if anything we could make something for all of us being able to spar. But at this rate..." I was cut off as I ducked, pulling Rauxdi down with me as Xaldin flew over our heads and slammed into the wall behind us.

"This might be a little more dangerous than I thought," I laughed nervously as Rauxdi whacked me on the back of the head. "You're going to get us killed because of this damn fight club of yours!"

"First rule of fight club is we don't talk about fight cl-" I was stopped as Rauxdi just groaned in annoyance, "Please tell me you didn't get your idea for this club from that damn movie?"

"I mean, wouldn't it be cool if one of the members were like split personality disorder and it came out that they were a badass after all?" I said with twinkling eyes as Rauxdi just shook her head pointing out at nothing, "Stop trying to ruin movie plots for your own good!"

"Well, if anything this gets the bigger lads space to not blow off their aggressions on the castle," Saix said as he walked past us to give Xaldin a potion. He turns it over and pours it all over Xaldin's face, soaking him completely.

"Well, at least three people are happy with these results of the club," Rauxdi said with a sigh as I grabbed her shoulder, "Wanna see what I got planned next?"

"Guess I don't get a choice do I," She rolled her eyes as we continued to the next club.

* * *

"You have to be joking! There's no way that the little witch would ever do something like that!" Marluxia said sipping a cup of piping hot tea as Larxene nodded wagging her finger at the man.

"I'm telling you Marly, she was so god damn ballsy that I thought she was going to be a boy after all that shit she did," The Nymph said leaning back on the couch with a beer in hand.

"Even if that little witch was causing an issue with our plans, we're still going to be on top, ya know?" Xigbar said grabbing some small sandwiches from a platter as the others agreed.

Rauxdi just raised her eyebrow as she looked at me, "Let me take a guess. A whimsical topsy-turvy tea party?"

"Sort of close Raux. This is the Messenger Pigeon club! Call it a form of a gossiping circle where there's everlasting food and drinks for anyone's taste buds to try," I said as I fluffed up some pillows in the Grey Area as we noticed aside from Xigbar, Larxene and Marluxia; Vexen and Zexion were having their own discussions over books and Axel, Demyx, and Roxas were fighting over the best comic books I got for them from Earth.

"I gotta be impressed, as long as you keep them happy in the smallest ways, this whole club thing might work out." She said with a smile as I shrugged.

"I mean, we do have a lot of shitty gossip around the Castle, I just figured that this was an easier way to keep the fighting in one space if possible."

"What do you m-"

"What do you mean that my hair is fucked up?! It is flawless you uncultured bastard!" We turned around to see Marluxia starting a fight with Xigbar as he hollered, "Oh please pretty boy. You might as well shave it off and you'd look tons better without that moss nest!"

"We'll see about that Xigbar," He snarled as he summoned his weapon as Xigbar did the same grinning, "Let's settle th-"

"Do it outside fellows!" Luxord walked over slapping the two on the backs as he glared at both of them. He was wearing a khaki-colored police uniform with aviator sunglasses on his head.

"But Luxo-" "I can't have you guys destroying the building, so go ask the Struggle Club if you can use their arena to settle your differences," He barked as he sent the two Nobodies through a dark corridor.

Rauxdi just pointed with a confused smile on her face, "Do I wanna know?"

I coughed covering the blush on my face with my hands as I replied, "He wanted to help me by being mild security just in case things got out of hand."

"Uh huh, sure that's why," Rauxdi grinned as I shouted trying to dismiss my embarrassment, "TO THE KITCHEN FOR OUR FINAL CLUB!"

* * *

"I hope you're learning your lesson from up there," Rauxdi whispered as I sighed danging a few feet from the floor, lances pierced through my clothes holding me.

"Now Numbers 00, would you both explain what you were doing before I came in here to see the kitchen was on fire, Axel was eating burnt toast, and Demyx was drunk on champagne?" Xaldin said sternly as he crossed his arms looking down at both of us.

"We were trying to set up the Make Your Damn Snack Club, but we might have gotten a little out of hand in the process of trying to make a simple breakfast," I said with a cheesy grin on my face as I suddenly dropped to the ground.

"A cooking club? Well, I don't appreciate you just coming in here and destroying the damn place. But at least you're not trying to hide it from me," Xaldin said as his Lances appeared back by his side.

"So, does that mean you're going to put a stop to the cooking club then?" Rauxdi asked as she helped me off the floor as he shook his head in defeat.

"I probably shouldn't have kept the kitchen to myself, but I know that this kitchen would be in flames the instant someone fucks up. Although... How about a deal?"

I raised my eyebrows as the man smirked, "Get everyone in here tomorrow morning and then I'll explain myself. We're going to try an experiment."


	9. Cooking Papa

All fourteen of us were sitting at the table as Xaldin stood in front of us with an apron on over his black jeans and grey v-neck. "Thank you Audri for bringing everyone here today, as I wanted to talk about-"

Xaldin was cut off as Xigbar and Axel started to boo him. "We were promised Earth girl titties!" They hollered as Xemnas punched both of them in the back of the head.

"Thank you Superior. As sleasy Audri might have been in getting you all here, I wanted to give everyone the chance to obtain the rights to cook in the kitchen," He explained as he summoned his lances holding it like a staff.

"This is for the fact that without my gourmet cooking, we'd all starve until you turned on each other," He grumbled as a few Nobodies rolled their eyes.

"So, who's willing to learn how to not burn the Castle down and cook a decent meal?"

"Well, I mean he's not wrong. I'm tired of just having milk and cereal," Roxas said shrugging as some of the younger Nobodies agreed.

"What's the plan?" I asked as Xaldin smiled summoning a piece of paper on the table. "Here's everyone's tasks for today."

 **Xemnas** : Cut the tomatoes and cabbage for the salad. **Lexaeus** : Use the salad spinner to dry vegetables. **Marluxia** : Plating the salad in good presentation.

 **Saix** : Go slaughter the cow outside. **Luxord and Roxas** : Prepare the cut into equal portions for each member. **Audri and Rauxdi** : Cook the meat to a medium rare.

 **Xigbar** : Core the apples and pears for the tart. **Vexen** : Crush frozen berries to make the base. **Axel** : Bake the tart to an even golden brown on the crust.

 **Zexion** : Prepare the dish settings for the dining area. **Demyx** : Compose some entertainment for the table. **Larxene** : Adjust the lighting for the dining 'mood'.

"Xaldin, what the hell are these tasks?" Larxene snarled as she slapped her hand onto the table.

"There are some people I assume need to work on different sets of skill. Mostly different types of control, and not overdoing it. I have to be honest, I have no doubt that Axel will destroy the kitchen before the Vipers do," Xaldin said gesturing over to Rauxdi and I.

"It doesn't matter, we will all do our best to make Xaldin let us come back into the kitchen," Xemnas said as he stood up with a determined look in his eye to be the best veggie cutter ever.

 _Oh boy, don't have a stroke Xaldin. You're better than this_ , Xaldin thought to himself as he clapped his hands. "Everyone, let's get to work!"

* * *

"So, how is Team Salad Fingers going?" Xaldin asked walking over to the south side of the kitchen seeing Xemnas dumping a batch of mashed tomatoes into a bowl. He glanced back and gave him a shaky thumbs up. "Doing great Number III, I think we're going to win those privileges easily," Xemnas said as Xaldin laughed nervously.

"I... I see, Superior... Lexaeus! What about-" Xaldin dodged a bowl of cabbage flying past his head as Lexaeus was holding his tomahawk in hand looking at him with slight fear in his eyes.

"It slipped," Lexaeus muttered as Xaldin shook his head glancing over at Marluxia who was reading a book and had a ton of tools laid before him."Marluxia, what in the blazes is th-"

"Don't touch that!" Marluxia swiped a pair of tongs from the older Nobodies hands as he laid it down perfectly, "They're to help me place each piece of cabbage and vegetables on the platter. I will make a masterpiece."

"Oh Kingdom Hearts, this is probably not a good idea." Xaldin groaned as he put his head into his hands crouching to the ground. He took a deep breath before he got back to his feet and dusted himself off, "Who's next... Team Barbie! What do you got for me?"

"I think you just put us together on the same team just to make that joke," Rauxdi scowled as Xaldin grinned poking a finger on her nose. "Maybe, but what's shaking ladies?"

"Well, we realized that Saix might be a softie as he still hasn't killed the damn cow you have outside," I gestured to the kitchen window as the three of us can see that Saix is just cuddling with the big dumb cow outside of the castle.

Xaldin opened the kitchen window and shouted down at the Berserker, "Why can't you kill the cow?!"

"Because this cow understands me better than all your mother fuckers!" Saix shouted back as the cow started to nibble on the end of his trench coat.

"That itself is cannibalism, right?" I asked gesturing to the fact that the trench coat is probably made as leather as Xaldin crosses his arms as he sniffs the air, "Well if the cow is still breathing outside, what's on the grill?"

Rauxdi and I glanced away from Xaldin's curious gaze as he suddenly looked around realizing the kitchen was down two blondes. "Holy fucking shit, hang on!" He shouted as he ran over, ripping the door off seeing Roxas and Luxord hogtied with apples in their mouth.

He yanked the two Nobodies out as he shouted at us, "Totally rejected at this point!" "We tried," I said as Rauxdi shrugged going over to go bother Marluxia.

"Team Crusty, please tell me you are having better luck..." Xaldin said glancing over at Xigbar, Vexen and Axel as they had their backs turned away from him. "Feast your eyes on this bad boy Lancer!" Vexen said as he turned out with a perfectly cooked fruit tartlet dusted with sugar and topped with a variety of fruit on top in bright colors.

Xaldin looked back between the crust and the team with his jaw dropped. "How...?" "Vexen said if we fucked this up, he'd obliterate us," Axel said with a shudder running down his sides as Xigbar laughed nervously.

"I mean... I can't be mad, I'm honestly impressed that Axel didn't fuck up," Xaldin said throwing his arms into the air before giving the group a thumbs up.

The three of them let out a sigh of relief as Xaldin walked away to go check out the dining room.

"If you fuckers tell him we bought that tart, you're going to regret it," Vexen hissed under his breath as Xigbar and Axel nodded nervously.

"What the hell happened?!" Xaldin said with a surprise as he saw that Zexion was muttering in the corner trying to figure out which fork was on which side of the plate, Demyx was strapped to the ceiling, dressed in drag, and Larxene was nowhere in sight.

"I... No, fuck this nonsense. Why am I teaching etiquette? That's Luxord's field," Xaldin said shaking his head as he heard a small explosion in the kitchen behind him.

He slowly turned around as the fire alarms started going off as smoke escaped from the swinging door.

"Guess we're doing take out tonight."


	10. Fright or Flight

"Let's go trick or treating!" Demyx pouted as I shook my head braiding my hair with Rauxdi's help.

"Pass, there's going to be a bunch of babies running around in tiny ass costumes. Let's just ask Luxord to get us drinks so we can never remember this night," Axel said as he threw a ball at the wall for Roxas to catch as it bounced back.

"Going to Earth to go find ghosts?" I suggested as Rauxdi moaned, "We tried doing that last time. I think we just fucked up Vexen more after that trip."

"So, I guess we're all going to stay in and not do anything," Roxas said as he tossed the ball over at Axel, making his friend fumble. All five of us sighed feeling defeated as Rauxdi went silent. "Well... There is one place I think we can go crash at, but only if you aren't all fucking pansies," She said glancing over the group as I finished tying my braid.

"You do?! And you were going to hide it from us?!" Axel shouted as Rauxdi stood up to stretch out her back, "Well the main reason is that we need more people to compete in a haunting challenge."

"A haunting challenge? Like, do we scare other people?" Demyx asked as I sighed, "A haunting challenge is a new trend where people are going into the most haunted areas across the worlds and treating it as a competition. Whoever stays the longest in the mansion gets entered into a raffle for the grand prize of 5 thousand munny."

Roxas grins as he pumped his arms into the air, "Then what are we waiting for? Let's go do it!"

"Well, if we wanna stand a chance, let's ask more people to join us. And I think I know some young morons that need munny like us," Rauxdi said with a grin as she made a dark corridor for all of us to follow her.

* * *

"So, I just sign this waiver?" I asked as the person at the booth nodded. "It's to make sure that if you get injured from running away from any demons or spirits, you can't sue the contest providers," The man said with a cheery grin as I slowly signed the contract.

"You know, I think this was probably a good idea to do a fun outing like this," Marluxia said as he dusted off his costume as he was dressed as a victorian vampire.

"Agreed," Xigbar said as he pranced about dressed as an astronaut. Larxene sighs as she was dressed in a somewhat slutty tavern wrench outfit that looked one size too small.

"So, do we wanna split up or go into the house altogether?" Roxas asked as him, Axel, and Demyx were dressed up as the three pigs with matching plastic pig noses.

"I think we get a better chance if we all go in together since if we still have a few people left, we can still get the munny prize!" Rauxdi said as she spoke through her bandages dressed like a mummy.

"So... Who goes first?" I said, dressed up in a bird mascot outfit glancing at everyone through my linty eye openings. Luxord helped keep me from falling over as he was dressed super casual in a leather jacket, jeans, and combat boots.

"We'll go on ahead and follow our leadership!" Axel hollered as he dragged Demyx and Roxas towards the haunted house. The rest of us shrugged and follow after them.

* * *

"So... What's the story behind this place?" Roxas asked as he fell behind to talk to Rauxdi and the other adults around us.

"Well, from what I understood... This place was owned by a farm owner who owned several properties like this place. He was ruthless, killing hundreds of people for his own greedy ways. Some people say he did it out of spite as people kept rejecting his advances, so he went ballistic on his servants," Rauxdi explained as everyone just rolled their eyes back.

Larxene snorted as she spoke up clinging onto Marluxia, "Sounds like something Xemnas is doing if he keeps it up like this with his planning."

That got a few chuckles from the group as Axel groaned turning around looking at everyone else, "What a waste coming out here! I haven't seen anything spooky yet!"

"If you say so- wait! What's that thing behind you?" Roxas shouted pointing a finger as Axel whipped around in fear. Everyone just laughed as Axel came face to face with nothing but darkness in front of him.

"I thought we were friends Roxas," Axel pouted as I heaved inside of my mascot costume, "Don't give me a panic attack! I can only do so much in this outfit." Luxord shook his head as he pushed me in the right direction, "Are you sure you want to keep wearing this?"

"Yes, because it's charmed with self-defense spells if any spooky things happen tonight," I said flapping my stubby wings as Xigbar rolled his eyes before sliding over to Rauxdi's side, "This is a shit show, gotta be honest. You think shit would happen at some time, right guys?"

He expected a response from the entire group but realized there was one reply short. The other looked around as I started asking, waddling in place, "Guys? Where's Demyx?"

"Are you telling me the cry baby already got lost?" "Or maybe got chicken shit and turned around," Larxene said as Marluxia sighed, "He was with us the last minute or so..."

A faint _plop_ noise was made as something hit the top of my mascot costume.

"Who hit my head?" I pouted as everyone glanced over at me to see a blue ooze dripping down the mascot head. It was translucent but gave off this eerie glow, like it was abnormal beyond hell.

Another _plop_ was made with another dribble of ooze dripped onto the floor next to Roxas' foot. Everyone started to tense up as they started to slowly look up towards the ceiling.

Everyone went pale as they saw Demyx tangled up in an oozy web, completely tied up as a massive spider was looking down at the group with it's beady white eyes and dripping pinchers.

* * *

"Fuck this shit, let's go!" Rauxdi shouted as Luxord and her started pushing me down the hallway, faster than I can keep my feet running as everyone else ran behind cursing. "Giant spiders? What is this, a fucking radiation plant?! That thing was massive!" Axel shouted as he drew his chakrams out just in case it came down to get him.

"Who knows, but- Quick! Into that room ahead!" Roxas shouted as he hitched a ride on top of my costume, seeing a door cracked open ahead.

The others shouted with brief joy until there was a squealing noise coming from the back of the pack. "Dammit flower boy, can't you just kill it?! It's like a pest in your garden!" Xigbar shouted as Marluxia was foaming at the mouth on the ground in fear as the spider had come from the ceiling, dropping down, and tackling the Scythe wielder to the ground.

"No use, let's just leave him for dead!" Larxene shouted as she threw a kunai at the spider's head, making a little impact but pissing off the massive arachnid.

"Almost there-" Luxord shouted as he and Rauxdi shoved my costume through the door, making a faint _pop_ noise as everyone crashed into the room. Rauxdi ran over to slam the door shut and hold it closed with Roxas' help. The spider was hissing and banging on the other side of the door as it tried to break in.

"What do we do now?!" Axel moaned in panic as I started kicking off my mascot costume, seeing that the situation changed from a fun time to a marathon nightmare.

"Well if I remember the contract, we have until sunrise to hold it out for the prize. There were booby traps and other things in this place mentioned that could reset your progress or immediately take you out of the running," I mentioned as Luxord helped me off the floor.

"How about a big 'fuck this place' and go home?" Roxas said with a mild gesture of his hand as everyone groaned. "Come on Roxas, we can't just take the easy way ou-" Xigbar was cut off as everyone just looked at him with big eyes and a scared expression on their faces.

"I'm afraid to ask," He said as he summoned his guns and spun around to see ghosts and zombies sneaking into view from their corner of the room. "What the fuck is this place?!" Larxene snarled as she got in a defensive pose as Roxas summoned his keyblade.

"Dunno, but we gotta get ou-" Luxord was interrupted as he was swallowed by a trap door underneath his feet. "Luxord!" I shouted about to jump into the hole but Axel kept me back trying to find another exit to this room.

"I don't know if this is the end, but guys... I hate all of you equally," Rauxdi said as she summoned her gauntlets as Xigbar made kissy noises in a mocking manner.

* * *

"So... What did we learn today kids?" Vexen said crossing his arms over his chest looking down at all of us sitting in front of the haunted house, or what was left of it.

"To remember that people have very creative ideas and that everything is fake?" I asked as Vexen nodded, "And that if you cause any more disturbances, we're going to be up in our eyeballs in more lawsuits!"

I laughed nervously as Luxord, Marluxia, and Demyx sat on the sidelines eating sea salt ice cream with emergency blankets on them.

Xemnas walked over and tapped Vexen on the shoulder, "Well the best we can do is have Naminé erase the local's memories so we don't have to worry about paying hospital bills and insurance damages. Make them assume their plans were a failure and to sully in their faults."

"That's pretty fucked up Xemnas, even for you," Xigbar said standing up behind Rauxdi with his costume burnt to shreds.

"No matter, I think we learned that Nobodies don't have hearts, but they do scare quite easily," Vexen said with a chuckle as Larxene glared up at her two superiors as she drank from a bottle of whiskey she brought with her.

"Let's go home and never talk about this?" Roxas asked as everyone there agreed.


	11. Her Strange Obsession

"Thank god school is out for the summer!" I moaned as I threw my bag onto the floor as I exited the dark corridor. "Out for the semester already?" Xemnas said sipping a cup of coffee as he read Vexen's research reports.

"Yeah, just finished my last final today. I had made a really bad project out of yarn, but the class really liked it! I was surprised that they liked a piece of garbage like that," I said plopping down on a chair in Xemnas' office as he continued to ignore me.

"Maybe that's just what modern art is these days," He said coldly as I shrugged, "Whatever passes those classes I guess?"

He put down his cup and papers as he raised an eyebrow at me, "And why exactly are you here?"

"Well, I have a problem. I don't know what to do with the extra supplies I bought," I said as I pulled the bag off the floor to shake out a couple of skeins of yarn. They dropped all over Xemnas' desk as he sighed.

"Why not just throw them out?"

"I spent tons of munny on these babies! Plus, they can still be put to good use!" I moped as he rolled a ball of yarn back towards me.

"Not really our problem. Why not just put those skills from class to good use and make something for the castle. We could use a nice tea cosey," Xemnas said as he picked up his mug again. I sighed as I scooped all the yarn into my arms and stuffed them back into my bag, "If you say so Superior. Don't say I didn't warn you."

* * *

"So, as I was saying, I saw this hot piece of ass down in Twilight Town, and I-" Xaldin was cut off as he walked into the kitchen with Demyx to find his kitchen covered in grandma squares and colorful yards and yards of yarn.

"What is this?" Demyx asked as he picked up a granny square before throwing it two inches away from its original spot. A screech was heard from the other side of the room, making the two Nobodies jump unsure what or who that was. They walked over and peeked to see me working away on a few granny squares linked together on a crochet hook.

"Motherfucking color is almost out. I need more yarn to continue," I hissed under my breath until Xaldin forced a cough to catch my attention as I looked up at him.

"Hey guys, what's going on?" I asked as Xaldin grabbed me by the front of my shirt as he pulled me to my feet, "What in Kingdom Hearts name are you doing?"

"I'm making stuff for the kitchen. Knife covers, tea coseys, cup coseys, spoon and fork holders, napkins-"

"Why does it look like an absolute mess then? Shouldn't this be more organized?" Demyx piped in, making the two of us glare at him for butting into the conversation as I sighed getting Xaldin to put me back down.

"It is organized, all the squares for the potholders are on the stove while the extra yarn is inside of the oven, and all the templates for the utensils are all over the counters and floor!" I said with bloodshot eyes and a grin on my face.

Demyx and Xaldin glanced over at each other before sighing, "Audri, dear. You can't make crafts where open... flames and water taps are. It will..."

"Ruin the project altogether if they get messy?" Demyx said as Xaldin nodded immediately turning to me, "Yes! Thank you Demyx, they would get so messy and it would be sad to see your... art get ruined."

I nodded as I snapped my fingers, opening small dark corridors of hailstorms to carry my supplies swiftly and out of the kitchen. "Fine, I'll go find another place to make more furniture covers too," I said with a hinted sulking tone in my voice as Demyx and Xaldin saw me leaving the kitchen.

"Should we let Xemnas know?"

"Not yet, I wanna see the girl cause him a massive headache for once and not affect us," Xaldin said with a smirk as Demyx nodded.

* * *

"Hey Saix, should I be worried?"

"About what Superior?"

"Well, I haven't thought about it, but have you seen Audri this past month?" Xemnas asked his subordinate as they walked down the hallway making their way to the Grey Area.

Saix put a hand to his own chin as he shook his head, "I don't think I have. Did you have business with her?"

"I was going to send her on a mission after she finished school for the semester, but she hasn't shown up to any of her meetings. And everyone I've sent to go find her hasn't gotten back to me either."

"Maybe they all skipped town, or couldn't care less. You did say that Audri could leave at any time. Maybe she got cold feet," Saix said with a shrug as they reached the entrance to the Grey Area.

"I would like to assume that everything is under my control. This is my castle and everyone should respect me!" Xemnas scoffed as he opened the doors to find the lounging space barely lit and a massive den filled with crocheted items.

"What the hell is this?" Saix asked in surprise as Xemnas raised his eyebrow, "Audri did mention something about having extra yarn from class... She couldn't mean all of this."

"Didn't you give her access to your munny because her education meant the world to you to be a top evil henchman?" The Luna Diviner asked as Xemnas summoned his Ethernal Blades glancing at the mess in front of him cutting it down, "Audri, what is going on here?"

A few minutes passed as Xemnas and Saix entered the catacomb made of yarn.

"This is ridiculous. Did she go mental?" Saix asked as Xemnas stayed silent cutting the yarn into bits and pieces to walk through.

Xemnas stopped Saix in his tracks as he heard something coming up in the distance.

"I want food~"

"Eat what she made you or she'll get angry at us Demyx"

"But I want real food! Xaldin, please do someth-"

"Unless you want yarn noodles, sorry boy."

Xemnas and Saix approached to see a dimly lit cavern with candles hanging from yarn made hooks from the ceiling and the rest of the Organization members plus Rauxdi sitting inside of a yarn cage with yarn spun handcuffs.

"Wait, is that Xemnas?" Vexen said struggling to get up as both Number I and VII rushed over to the constructed cage holding his fellow members.

"Holy shit, it is! And Saix! Unless Audri somehow made moving... uh... What's that word..." Zexion said scratching his head as Lexaeus spoke up, "Amigurumi."

"What is going on?" Xemnas said as Saix summoned his Claymore about to break the cage open before Axel shouted, "No Saix, stop!"

But it was too late as Saix started to swing the claymore at the cage, it got caught on something behind him. Saix and Xemnas turned around to see Audri standing there barely clothed with a blanket over her shoulders and a crocheted flower crown on her head. Saix's claymore was caught in a yarn-made lasso as they were playing tug of war almost.

"Welcome to the party Superior and Saix! Do you like what I've done with the living room?" I said with a cracked grin on my face as Xemnas backed up towards the cage as he whispered to everyone else, "What the fuck happened?"

"She went a little crazy, kind of kept going to buy yarn and making stuff. We tried to stop her but... Well here we are," Rauxdi said pulling her hands up to scratch her head as Vexen gestured to the entrance where they came from, "She took our weapons and hung them all like trophies."

"I can't believe you imbeciles got taken out by a little girl," Xemnas hissed as Xigbar shrugged, "Saix looks like he's next in getting his ass kicked."

Xemnas turns around to see me yanking as hard as I can to get Saix's claymore from his grasp, but there is a difference in power as Saix snarled fighting her back.

"I'm surrounded by fucking idiots," Xemnas groaned as he ran over with blades in hand as he tackled me to the ground to help Saix out.

* * *

"Take every piece of yarn out of here and burn it. It seems to be like a god damn trance to her imagination," Xemnas spat out as Axel started flinging his chakrams around to burn the massive pile of yarn in the Grey Area. As it crackled and burned, Xemnas turned his attention to my unconscious body as Marluxia and Rauxdi help me up from both sides.

"So glad it just took a few real hits to the head to knock her out," Marluxia said as Rauxdi nodded in agreement.

"I'm revoking munny access to her, probably better for her to not hoard and get obsessed on a particular project," Xemnas said as Xigbar raised his hand.

"Even the one where you were going to commission her to paint your naked photo for the Throne Room?" He asked with a dull look on his face as Xemnas just glared daggers at him.

Everyone just stared at Xemnas with a shudder of fear crossing over them as he shouted, "Everyone back to work, we're behind on plans as it is!"

"Yes Superior." Everyone there groaned as they all took their leave.


	12. End of Summer Vacation

"Thanks for taking us here Xemnas! I really miss doing these type of things," I said eating a batch of cotton candy as he shook his head, putting on a pair of sunglasses.

"Whatever keeps you from destroying the castle, even if it means having to do these one-day vacations more often," He said with a glare before he scanned the crowded streets.

The Organization found themselves at a tacky festival back on Earth celebrating some ridiculous summer holiday. He thought it was the best idea to see once and for all why Earth is not a prime target on his radar when it comes to any threatening forces. From what Xemnas found, is that humans are probably just as twisted or even crueler than the Organization, and he fucking loved it.

But for now, the groups were all scattered across the carnival grounds, spending all their munny on food, drinks, and carnival games.

"Now you can... Go with your comrades to enjoy your time off," Xemnas said with a gesture towards Axel, Demyx, Roxas, and Rauxdi as they were standing around taking selfies in their shorts and tank tops. I smiled finishing off the cotton candy and chasing the group down.

* * *

"So what do you guys wanna do next?" Roxas asked as Axel carried a massive stuffed puppy around with us. "We could always try winning more games involving water," Demyx said with a grin as Rauxdi groaned, "As much as I love using Demyx's power to cheat the carnies out of their stock, we are going to get shanked by them."

"Agreed," I moaned carrying around a couple more huge stuffed animals, dragging them on the ground behind me. "What about going on some rides?" We heard a voice behind us, making us all turn around to see Xigbar, Marluxia, Larxene, and Luxord grinning down at the shorter crowd holding a roll of ride tickets.

"Do I wanna know how you got those?" Rauxdi asked as Xigbar smirked gesturing to Luxord, "We might have made a few bets of our own against the carnie workers to get some tickets. Never knew most humans are so greedy."

"Why are we not surprised that Xigbar would be such a slimeball and use others for his own gain?" Larxene sneered as everyone laughed in agreement. "Alright alright, no need to 'rouse the crowd up with such remarks," Luxord said splitting the tickets up into huge strips to divide among everyone standing there, "The whole point is to have fun, no matter what."

Axel slammed the stuffed puppy onto the ground as he grabbed some tickets and held onto Roxas' arm, "Not wrong there, to the rollercoaster!" As the two friends took off in a flurry, Demyx took the stuffed animals from the ground that Axel and I were carrying as he shook his head.

"I'm going to get some more plush so I can defend myself from everyone else's attacks," Demyx said with a cracked grin on his face as he pulled some munny from his back pocket.

"Should we feel bad for the carnies going out of business?" I asked as Larxene laughed following after Demyx, "Not at all!" Marluxia laughed nervously as he followed the unusual pair as they took off into the crowd.

"So I guess you ladies are with us then for a few rides and games?" Xigbar said with a smirk as Rauxdi crossed her arms over her chest, "Only if you plan on paying for everything."

"That's not a bad trade," Xigbar said wrapping an arm around Rauxdi's shoulders before she stomped on his foot, making him jump back in pain.

"To the haunted house?" I asked as the three Nobodies glanced at me before turning around to walk away.

"H-hey! It's not scary like the last one!"

* * *

"I can't believe you get motion sickness."

"I can't believe we went on the ferris wheel," Rauxdi scoffed with her head in the nearby trash can trying to get some air.

Xigbar was laughing and probably trying to be on his best behavior to not take advantage of the sick Nobody, but he was failing miserably.

"If it makes you feel better Rauxdi, I'll make sure you don't get motion sickness from riding my dick," The Sharpshooter said with a twisted grin leaning on the garbage can Rauxdi was almost falling into.

She pulled her head up immediately and just glared up at him as he winked.

"I think dealing with the pervert is making me feel better," She grumbled as she walked beside us on the sidewalk.

"Could be the case. How about getting something else in your system. Like real food and not _your_ sausage Xigbar," Luxord said knowing that Xigbar would have taken the chance to say a stupid sex joke.

"Hey, you killed the mood with that Luxord, stealing my limelight on bad jokes," Xigbar said in a mocking tone as I sighed, "Well, what could we do?"

"Well... How would you like your fortune told?" We heard a voice from the side alleyway clear as day through the crowd. We glanced to see a small stand popped up with the sign **FORTUNE TELLER**. "For the ladies, I can do free of charge," She said with a lisp tingling her words.

"I'm sold!" I said dragging everyone over as Rauxdi, Luxord, and Xigbar exchanged looks. "I dunno, what type of fortunes can you tell us old coot?" Xigbar said crossing his arms across his chest as she scoffed at him, "I can do luck fortunes, look into your past, present, and future, love fortunes, when you'll die from-"

"Let's just do the luck fortunes I guess," Rauxdi said grumbling as I raised an eyebrow at her, "Are you sure?" "I just wanna prove that this is a bunch of bullshit," Rauxdi said with a determined flicker in her eyes as I sighed.

"Well of course, the cards will show you what I think can happen. It's up to you on how you use it," The fortune-teller cackled as she handed the cards for me to shuffle.

I shuffled the cards glancing back at Luxord with a quick grin as he was observing the crowd behind us.

"Now place the cards-"

There was a small boom as I slammed the deck on the table and had three cards in hand facing her, "What do you think?" She took the cards from my hands as she placed them down for us to see.

The old lady clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth as she pointed to the first card on the left side, "Hm, well it looks like you have good fortune coming towards you my dear. The Two of Cups means that someone with a strong connection to you will benefit your life. While this-"

As she pointed in the middle card with an illustrated drawing of a woman dressed in jewels and sacred treasures, "The High Priestess says that you will be using your inner voice to guide you during your upcoming trials. But I do find this one to be curious-"

The fortune-teller pointed to the last card on the right as it was flipped upside down, "As this card usually means you will be stricken to a grieving state, but you will instead be full of new life, full of acceptance of all choices you have made. It seems like your life will be full of some interesting direction."

I just glanced along the cards and shrugged, "If you put it that way, I would say that this is..."

"I think the word you're looking for is bullshit," Rauxdi scoffed as she walked over to the table towering over the crone sitting on the other side. "Now now my dear, this is my interpretation. If you woud like to give it a try-"

"I don't, I would love to make him do it instead," Rauxdi glanced behind her boring daggers into Xigbar.

"I don't trust the lady, but I figure maybe he needs more luck to stop getting his ass handed to him every time he harasses me," She said as Xigbar walked over to her side smirking, "I'll take it. What do I have to do?"

"Just shuffle the cards dear, and pick the ones that resonate with you," The fortune teller said as she already shuffled my cards back in the deck. Xigbar nodded as he took the deck from her hands as he shuffled them for everyone there to see. He glanced at Rauxdi for a second as she rolled her eyes from this gimmick, wanting him to hurry up.

He brushed the cards against Rauxdi's hand slightly as he placed the deck back on the table and picked three cards out for the old lady to interpret.

"Hmm, the Ten of Pentacles makes it sound like you have something related to a legacy bigger than yourself. Like... You're no god of the universe if you have been given that scar-" The old lady pointed to the one of Xigbar's face as she continued.

"But you plan to see the truth behind the bigger picture with the King of Swords as well. My words, this is the most interesting reading I've ever done!" She gasped in giddy nature as I asked glancing down at the last card on the right, "And what about this one?"

"Ah yes, the Wheel of Fortune. It is the biggest symbol that anyone would like. It can be interpreted as a good or bad sign, but it does mean that change will happen. There is a future that can be twisted and molded, but it will always be the same fate for you my dear," The fortune teller said as her gaze rested on Xigbar's satisfied face.

"I appreciate the fortune ma'am. I do hope that my young friend isn't affecting your mood with her negativity," Xigbar said as Rauxdi felt her face turn red from embarrassment.

She cackled with a shake of her head, "Nonsense my dear, I was young once. I used to be skeptical about all of this as well." Xigbar grinned as Luxord and I snorted from Rauxdi's fuming anger.

"Well, thank you for entertaining us," Xigbar said as he handed the cards back to the woman with some munny in hand. She smiled as she sorted her little stall out and waving her hand over her heart, "May your heart be your guiding key."

* * *

"I'm glad it's time to go home," I yawned as Luxord grabbed my hand as the four of us walked down the sunset painted street.

Rauxdi hasn't said a word since the fortune teller stall as Xigbar tapped her on the shoulder. She huffed as she glared up at him, "I kind of thought you were going to back me up on all of that hocus pocus bullshit."

"Maybe I am a little superstitious," He said shrugging his shoulders with a grin as she sighed. "I assume whatever happened with your eye made you that way?"

"Not really, just had an interesting upbringing," Xigbar said with a smile as they soon met up with the rest of the Organization.

"Now that everyone is almost here, I'll make a dark corridor for everyone to go home," Vexen said as he started making a dark corridor. Before anyone stepped through, there was shouting heard from behind them.

"Wait! Everyone, hold on!" Axel shouted as he caught up with the group sweating up a storm and barely breathing. "Axel? What is going on," Saix said with an annoyed look on his face as he carried Demyx's prizes in his arms.

"It's Roxas. W-we were together and I looked away for a second and-"

"What happened to Number XIII?" Xemnas said, having his interest piqued as Axel looked up at him with a serious look on his face.

"He's gone. I can't find him anywhere."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That is the end of Part 2 of the Heartless Series!
> 
> So as of this point, it will dive into very very loose but direct interpretations of the canonical Kingdom Hearts Universe. It will dive more into using BBS as lore and history, Kingdom Hearts 2 and 3 as the main setting, as well as touching base with both Union Cross and Dream Drop Distance.
> 
> This is the beginning of where things will get a little... complicated as Audri mentioned that Hades is well-known back on earth as a myth in history books back in Breaking Through Thick Shells.
> 
> To explain it in one sentence: Earth's stories and myths have come from otherworldly travelers who have seen things or tell stories about a time long ago.
> 
> So that means that stories like Alice in Wonderland, Rapunzel, Snow White, Cinderella, Little Mermaid, and Beauty and the Beast are a few of the many references that Audri might point out from her own remembrance of things found on Earth. 
> 
> It's not like I am referring to just the disney stories and movies. I am referring to like old Grimm story tales as those were the first as well as many other authors.
> 
> While Audri turns into an obnoxious mini-Vexen when it comes to history, there will be more X-rated scenes in the future. I wanted to loosely build up character storylines and relationships before I went into them just all having sex. So expect that coming sooner than you think.
> 
> Now that everything has been said and done, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Please watch out for more!


End file.
